


Joke's On Us

by brodeurbunny30, idareu2bme



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: AU, Angst and Humor, Barry fixates, Barry has crushes, Bisexual Barry Allen, Canon-Typical Violence, Crack, Drunkenness, Everybody loves a bad boy, Feelings are Scary, Feelings are a distraction, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gay Leonard Snart, Hand waving, House Hunting, Humor, Idiotic, Leonard Snart is Bad at Feelings, Leonard Snart is Big Dick Energy, Leonard Snart is an Idiot, Light Angst, M/M, Pranks, Ridiculous Leonard Snart, Shenanigans, Sort of canon divergent... mostly au, coldflash - Freeform, crack fic turned plotty, is this a different timeline?, lame pranks, possibly, pseudo courting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-02-26
Packaged: 2019-10-20 16:54:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 30,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17626055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brodeurbunny30/pseuds/brodeurbunny30, https://archiveofourown.org/users/idareu2bme/pseuds/idareu2bme
Summary: “Okay, okay,” said Caitlin, pressing her fingers to her temple. “Let me get this straight. You two stumbled across the private residence of infamous criminal Leonard Snart, also known as Captain Cold, on your way home from the bar.”Barry and Cisco nodded together.“And so you decided to ring his doorbell and run away?” asked Caitlin slowly, her voice dripping with judgment





	1. ...and it Begins

It was late Saturday night --well, it was probably more likely Sunday morning by then, and Barry was leaning heavily against Cisco as they walked through the dark alley. They were headed back to Cisco's place from the nearby bar. Barry was singing the chorus of an old song he had stuck in his head over and over again. Cisco had joined in once or twice back at the bar, but by then it had gotten a bit old for him. They were both drunker than they probably should have been, but after the week -no, _month_ they had had, it was absolutely necessary to blow off some steam. Barry was just grateful Cisco and Caitlin had figured out a serum that could inhibit his metabolism enough to allow him to feel the effects of alcohol for a time.

 

“Shit,” Cisco suddenly exclaimed, jumping to the side and pulling Barry with him.

 

“Whoa, whoa, what?” stammered Barry, struggling to keep up. How did Cisco get so fast?

 

“Dude,” whispered Cisco, crouching in the shadows of a backyard’s fence.

 

Barry frowned at him curiously, but crouched down next to him when Cisco widened his eyes at him.

 

“What?” he asked and why was it so hard to keep his balance? He put a hand on the fence to steady himself.

  
  
“I--is-sn’t that Sssnart?” whispered Cisco, his words more than a bit slurred. He pointed across the alley with an unsteadily outstretched finger.

 

Barry stared at Cisco’s finger for a beat before he remembered he should actually be looking at where it was pointed. He turned his head in time to see a figure in a big coat walking up the steps at the back of the house across the alley.

 

“He’s breaking into sssomeone’s house!?” hissed Cisco. “We gotta… we gotta do something.”

 

“We should call the Flash!” suggested Barry in excitement.

 

“You _are_ the Flash, genius,” groaned Cisco.

 

“Right,” said Barry nodding thoughtfully.

 

He started to stand. If he was the Flash then he should probably go stop the bad guy, afterall. Cisco was quick to grab his forearm and pull him back down. Barry’s butt hit the ground and he turned to glare at Cisco in surprise.

 

“You’re too drunk to go toe to toe with Captain Cold, bro.”

 

“ _Shit_ ,” said Barry when the wisdom of Cisco’s words hit him. Then he snickered because toe to toe and bro rhymed.

 

They watched as the figure that could only be Leonard Snart (especially considering his buzzed hair and the fact that he was wearing a coat much too heavy for the warm summer night) took out keys from his pocket and unlocked the door before stepping in. That’s when it dawned on Barry...

  
  
“Oh!! Wh...wha… SHISCO! W..what if that’s Shhhnart’s house!”

 

Cisco was quiet for a moment then spat out an emphatic “ _shit!_ ”

 

“What?” yipped Barry in surprise.

  
  
“This is _my_ neighbourhood, dude!”

 

“So?”

 

“Captain Cold is my _neighbour_!” hissed Cisco, his face contorting in horror. The expression was exaggerated further by the shadows in the dark. It was hilarious.

 

Barry broke out into a fit of giggles. Cisco pushed him in annoyance and Barry nearly fell over.

 

“We should go say hi,” said Barry, righting himself.

 

“What!? NO!” exclaimed Cisco. “Are you _insane_!?”

 

* * *

 

 

Leonard Snart dropped his blue parka over the chair in the corner of his bedroom and pulled his off his goggles that had been hanging around his neck to set on his dresser. He was sore and tired with a bone deep exhaustion that made it feel like he was moving through water. It had been a long week --no, _month_ , and his last gig had taken some extra doing to keep on track. It was good to finally get to go home to his private residence. He was looking forward to a hot shower and a long sleep.

 

Noises outside caught his attention. He froze and listened for a moment. It was laughter and scuffling in the back alley. Probably some idiotic drunks on their way home from the nearby bar. It was nearly closing time, afterall. With that established, Leonard left his room to go grab a towel from the hall closet and have his shower.

  
In the bathroom, he set the folded towel down on the counter and opened the shower curtain to turn on the water. Bending just to do that sent a sharp pain up his back and he lost his breath for a moment.

  
“Damn, you ain’t getting any younger,” he muttered to himself, bracing a hand on his thigh and taking a breath before reaching for the valve again and actually turning the shower on.

  
  
The doorbell rang. At the same time, his security system let out a ding.

 

Leonard’s eyes widened in surprise. The doorbell was so underused that the chime of it sounded foreign to him. But the truly confusing aspect of the situation was why his security system had been so slow to respond to someone on his property.

  
  
The doorbell rang again.

 

“What the hell,” he grumbled before stiffly straightening and walking to the front door. Ignoring the tablet on the counter, he instead grabbed a knife from the knife block in the kitchen on his way. 

  
  
He stood to the side of the door, just in case whoever was there was planning on kicking it down or shooting through it. With quick movements, he leaned forward to glance out the peephole. There was no one. Then the doorbell rang again. Leonard startled. The perpetrator must be at the back door. Knife still at the ready, Leonard turned and trudged back through the kitchen, past his hallway, and down the half set of stairs to the back door. 

 

The doorbell rang three times in quick succession. Leonard grit his teeth in annoyance.

 

There was no peephole in the back door, so he stood to the side, letting the wall block most of his body, raised his knife in one hand and opened the door fast with the other.  
  
Someone had been running away across the gravel in Leonard’s parking space. But the person tripped in surprise at Leonard throwing the door open. It was a young guy and his arms wheeled comically in the air like something out of a cartoon. He swung around in a desperate attempt to regain his balance, but ended up crashing into the two metal garbage cans standing against the fence. It sent up a terrible cacophony of noise and made two different dogs start barking in the distance. 

 

Leonard turned on the porch light and took a few steps out of his house. Mouth set in a line, Leonard looked down at the gangly, young idiot laid out in the pile of garbage cans. It was Barry Allen. Barry... fucking... Allen... was laying in a pile of garbage in his back yard looking dazed.

 

"What the _hell_ are _you_ doing here?" barked Leonard.

 

"Uhh..." groaned Barry, blinking in the sudden light and wearing a stupid, crooked smile. "Pranking you?"

 

"Dude! don't _tell_ him!" exclaimed someone from the other side of the back alley.

 

Bewildered, Leonard glanced past Barry to try to see the other person. They were hidden by the deep shadows, but, based on the voice, Leonard imagined it was likely Cisco.

 

Clanging and shuffling pulled Leonard’s attention back to the idiot on the ground in front of him. Barry was scrambling to his feet, but fell over a couple more times, tripping over the garbage bags that had spilled from the dented garbage cans. When he had finally found his footing, he ran to the alley in an awkward gait that was of a decidedly human speed, laughing all the way.

Leonard furrowed his brow and shook his head. Was he dreaming? The kid was obviously drunk as a skunk and, from the giggling that erupted when he reached the shadows where the other person was hiding, they were likely just as drunk. The two were whispering very loudly, though between the distance and how slurred they sounded, it was impossible to make out what they were actually saying. Probably nonsense.

  
  
Two figures suddenly emerged from the shadows and ran in crouches down the back alley as if they were trying to remain unseen even though they were very, very visible. And yes, the other was definitely Cisco Ramon.

  
  
“For fuck's sake,” sighed Leonard, pinching the bridge of his nose.

 

These were the leaders of Team Flash? The brains and the super-brawn of the team that more often than not thwarted his carefully laid plans? THESE GUYS? What the hell.

  
  
Leonard closed his eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled heavily through his nose before turning off the outside light and going back inside. He locked the door and went back to his shower... which, of course, had been running the whole time and now all the hot water had been used up.

 

“Damnit, Barry Allen.”

  


* * *

 

 

Barry and Cisco stumbled into STAR labs leaning against each other, giggling. Barry glanced around the room and spotted Caitlin in the lab one room over. He pulled Cisco with him and they were quick to go see her.

  
  
When the entered the room, Caitlin looked up from whatever it was she had been doing. Barry had asked her to go out to the bar with them earlier that evening, but she had said she had work to do in the lab. He guessed she must have been telling the truth and not just blowing them off since there she was, still in her lab coat surrounded by beakers and things when it was past midnight. She really needed to lighten up.

  
  
Barry let out a hiccup that was supposed to be a hello and dissolved into giggles. Caitlin smiled wryly at them.

 

“Have a nice time at the bar, boys?” asked Caitlin.

 

“Yeah, it was _awesome_ ,” said Barry.

 

“Meet anyone cute?” she asked, brushing by them to take off her latex gloves and wash her hands in the small sink.

  
  
“No,” said Barry, swaying where he was standing. He felt less drunk than earlier, but still so very drunk. He hoped his super healing would mean he didn’t have a horrible hangover in the morning especially since it had been so long since he last was drunk. “We played some pool and some darts and shang song somes and… wait.. sang… some… songs… hah… and then--”

 

“Wait, wait, wait,” said Cisco, holding up his hands dramatically. “We came here to tell you something very serious.”

 

Barry laughed at Cisco's wide eyes and exaggerated frown.

  
  
“OH!” said Barry, eyes widening when he suddenly remembered why they had come. “I remember!”

 

Caitlin turned around to face them and crossed her arms. Her head was cocked to the side and her eyebrow raised like she didn’t think their news could possibly be very serious. Barry took a deep breath, excited to wipe that look off her face with what he was about to reveal.

 

“We know where Captain Cold lives!” blurted Cisco.

 

“Ahhh, duuuude,” whined Barry, shoulders dropping, “you said I could tell her. I was the one who actually did the dare!”

 

“It wasn’t a dare!” exclaimed Cisco, his voice doing that high pitched thing it sometimes did. “I never dared you! I didn’t want you to--”

 

“Wait,” cut in Caitlin. “What? You know where Captain Cold lives?”

  
  
“Yeah,” said Barry gleefully, “and I got him _so good_!”

 

“What,” said Caitlin, though it didn’t actually sound like a question. Barry furrowed his brow at that for a second before shrugging to himself ready to move on.

  
  
“Cisco dared me to prank him,” he explained proudly.

 

“You rang his doorbell and ran away,” deadpanned Cisco.

  
  
Barry cackled. He had gotten him _so good_. It was such a good prank.

 

“What?” squeaked Caitlin.

 

“Yeah!” laughed Barry. “Oh, man, Caitlin, you should have seen his face!!”

  
  
“That’s _not_ how the prank goes, Barry,” said Cisco. He had his head tilted back and was staring up at the ceiling like he was frustrated for some reason. Barry frowned in confusion again.

 

“NOT that I dared you to prank him and even if I had, that’s _barely_ a prank and you didn’t even do it right.” ranted Cisco. “They _aren’t_ supposed to see you when you ring the doorbell and run away! And now Captain Cold knows it was us and he is going to _kill_ me in my sleep.”

 

“Why just you?” asked Caitlin.

 

Barry and Cisco both looked at her. Okay, Barry knew he wasn’t in the best state of mind at the moment, but he was _pretty_ sure what Caitlin just said was… a bit not good as John Watson would say. Haha, John Watson. Hah. Sherlock.

 

“I meeaan, why _you_ specifically, Cisco?” amended Caitlin. “It sounds like Barry was the one to pull the… prank.”

  
  
“Because he lives near my house!” exclaimed Cisco, pulling on his hair. “CAPTAIN COLD lives two blocks from my house, Caitlin! How did this happen!? How is this my life!”

 

Barry giggled.

 

“Okay, okay,” said Caitlin, pressing her fingers to her temple. “Let me get this straight. You two stumbled across the private residence of infamous criminal Leonard Snart, also known as Captain Cold, on your way home from the bar.”

  
  
Barry and Cisco nodded together.

  
  
“And so you decided to ring his doorbell and run away?” asked Caitlin slowly, her voice dripping with judgment.

  
  
Barry grinned and nodded harder.

 

“But you didn’t run away fast enough and Captain Cold saw you?” finished Caitlin.

  
  
“You should have seen his face!” exclaimed Barry with a laugh.

 

“Oh my gosh,” breathed Caitlin.

 

  
“I’m dead, I’m dead, I’m dead,” chanted Cisco under his breath, grabbing his hair and turning away to pace the room.

  
  
Barry didn’t know what everyone’s problem was, he had gotten Snart _so good_ .

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to brodeurbunny30 and hopelesslyaddicted for their input!!


	2. You Owe Me A New Garbage Can

Leonard woke the next morning stiff and sore. He sat up and rubbed a hand across tired eyes and back over his head. Not one to luxuriate in the grogginess of first waking up, that was all the idling he allowed himself before swinging his legs over the side of the bed and standing. He had gone to bed without a shower last night because of the whole hot water thing. So, he decided to run a bath that morning even though it would be a deviation from routine.

 

Even Captain _Cold_ needed a _hot_ bath once in a while, he thought wryly to himself as he crossed the hall to the bathroom and started the water. While the water was running, he got on with his morning routine; toilet, wash, brush teeth, check phone for messages, head to the kitchen to check the security system and get something to eat.

 

The tablet was blinking where it sat on the kitchen counter next to the main control for his custom security system. It meant there was new security footage to review. He had paid a hefty sum for the customized security system with facial recognition and automated surveillance, but for someone with allies as dangerous as enemies, it was worth it. It was set to record every time there was movement on or around his property and back-up the footage on the tablet.  

 

Leonard picked up the tablet and leaned against the counter. He typed in his lock code and swiped to open the new footage. A small smirk pulled at the side of his mouth as he watched the footage of Barry Allen arriving at his back door in a blur of speed. Obviously intoxicated, he nearly fell over as he skidded to a stop on the doorstep. Leonard’s smirk turned into an outright chuckle as he watched Barry run away at human speed, trip over his own feet, flail exaggeratedly, and crash into the garbage cans. It had happened too quickly the night before and had been too bizarre for Leonard to truly appreciate the hilarity in its entirety before.

  
  
He took the tablet with him back to the bathroom, grabbing an apple from the bowl on the table on his way. Once settled in his bath, apple held in his teeth, Leonard watched the footage of Barry’s “prank” again --because it was _fucking_ _hilarious--_ before checking on previous footage. Everything else the motion activated footage had caught over the past week was benign; birds, cats, neighbours. Leonard reached up to set the tablet on the bathroom counter before settling back into the hot water. He leaned his head back and sunk lower, closed his eyes and began to eat his apple.

 

Lisa would drop by as she always did, but probably not until evening. She would always sleep the majority of the day after they finished a big job. Then she would come over like she owned the place, the only other person with the code to his house and one of a very small group of people whose faces wouldn’t set off an alarm on his tablet and phone if they set foot inside. If she were feeling generous, or more likely, if she herself were craving something, she would bring supper from some take-out place. Usually, though, she’d just barge in, raid his fridge, and plop down on his couch expecting to be entertained.

 

He had an entertaining story for her this time.  She would think it hilarious. He could imagine her disbelief and demand for proof, could imagine her throwing her head back and cackling upon seeing the footage. Still, he didn’t really want to tell her. As much as he loved his sister, as much as she was his lifeline and sanity in the business they were in, he still preferred to play some things closer to the chest. Because, in the end, information is power... _and power means control_.

 

This particular information would come with a lot of baggage. Barry Allen and Cisco Ramon trying to drunkenly prank him was information that Lisa didn’t need to know. It would be too bold a clue toward the identity of the Flash and Leonard had given his word to the kid about not outing him. Not that keeping any word he’d given to his nemesis was really that important to him, but the whole situation was tenuous. The truce would work best with less moving parts, which meant less people knowing about it. And as much as Leonard trusted his sister, he also _trusted_ her to be rash. Unfortunately, as amusing as the events of the night before might be on the surface, the fact remained that Team Flash apparently knew where his private residence was.

 

Despite their _close_ ties with the city police and Flash’s position as nemesis to Captain Cold, there _were_ probably worse people to have this information. Leonard wasn’t actually sure if Team Flash knowing where he lived would end up being a problem any time soon. Barry Allen was more likely to keep his word than Leonard ever was. Still, it was probably best to start looking at real estate. He couldn’t leave himself open like that, even a _saint_ like the Flash would be tempted to use information for his own gain should the right situation arise. Leonard couldn’t afford to be sloppy. He could _never_ afford to be sloppy.

 

Leonard grabbed the tablet and watched the footage from last night again, snickering to himself when Barry fell into the garbage cans once more. There needed to be some sort of retaliation. Even the smallest of slight had to have consequences. _No one fucks with Captain Cold_. Leonard stared at the tablet for a few beats. Then a slow smile began to creep across his face. Barry Allen wanted to get personal, Leonard could get personal.

 

\--------

 

Barry skidded to a stop just outside the main room of STAR Labs, stack of papers under his arm, before pushing through the door and tiptoeing in. Cisco was slouched at the computer, dark sunglasses on. Barry smirked despite himself.

 

“Don’t you dare tell me that your healing factor means you have no hangover,” muttered Cisco without even looking up. “I’m serious, Barry. I’ll be _so_ mad.”

 

Barry grinned cheekily at Cisco, leaning over the counter.

 

“Okay,” he said. “I won’t.”

 

“AUGH,” groaned Cisco. “I’m _so_ mad.”

 

Barry chuckled before quickly sobering. He walked around the counter to stand next to Cisco.

 

“So, uh…” he whispered, looking around guiltily hoping no one else would overhear.“We _may_ have a problem.”

 

Cisco perked.

 

“Remember our uh… prank last night?” asked Barry.

 

“ _Your_ prank,” corrected Cisco. “And _that_ was _hardly_ a prank.”.

 

“Augh, I know,” hissed Barry. “I _know_ it was hardly a prank, I know it was just dumb, but we _were_ kind of _drunk_ at the time!?”

 

“Anyway, what about it?,” asked Cisco, leaning over his desk irritably. “And make it quick so I can get back to repressing it.”

  
  
Barry set the papers he had brought down on the desk in front of Cisco. They were printed screencaps of a security video. Apparently Leonard Snart had a security system with multiple cameras. The screencaps showed Barry at the house, Barry falling, Barry laying in spilled garbage looking dazed… all from multiple angles.

 

“How’d you get these?” asked Cisco. “This is some quality resolution for surveillance footage.”

  
Barry took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

  
  
“They printed off my home printer about twenty minutes ago,” he said.

 

“What? Like remotely?” his voice wavered with sudden anxiety.  
  
Barry nodded.

 

“Like _someone_ knew my wifi password and sent them to my printer.”

 

“SHIT!” yelped Cisco “He’d have to be in the area to do that, man… like right by your apartment… like creeping in your stairwell... Shit! Cold knows where you live??”

 

“I already knew that Snart knows where I live,” sighed Barry, looking up at the ceiling as he realized he hadn’t told anyone about that.

 

“What?”

  
  
“He came by once to… try to intimidate me, I guess?” said Barry with a helpless shrug. “But, anyway…”

 

“No, no no, _WHAT_ ?” said Cisco, shaking his finger at Barry.

  
  
“ANYWAY,” said Barry “What do you think?”

 

Cisco frowned heavily at Barry, but eventually gave in.

 

“What do I think about what?” he asked. “Because all of this… is not good. It is _quite_ far from good. Plus I thought we had promised no secrets and here I’m _just_ finding out about Captain Cold making house calls f--”

  
  
“About _this_ ,” cut in Barry, grabbing the papers from Cisco’s hands. “What do you think it means? Do you think he’s amused? Mad? Do you think he’s going to do anything more about this than just send me these screencaps in a mildly intimidating way?”

 

The dark sunglasses hiding a lot of Cisco’s face still didn’t impede Barry from witnessing the horror that suddenly took over. Cisco’s face paled, his mouth dropped open. He rubbed a hand over his forehead and leaned back in his chair.

 

“Do you think he knows where I live, too?” asked Cisco. “Do you think he’s going to do creepy things to _me_ like remotely send photos of _me_ to _my_ printer? What if he’s mad? What if… _augh_ , why is he _so_ creepy?”

 

“Why is who so creepy?”

  
  
Barry and Cisco both startled and looked up at Caitlin’s voice.

  
  
“Uhhh…” stuttered Barry, trying to pass the papers to Cisco to hide under the desk as Caitlin walked into the room.

  
She rolled her eyes and reached to grab the papers. Her brow furrowed as she looked through them. Barry shared a guilty look with Cisco.

  
  
“These are from last night at Snart’s house?” she asked as she flipped through them.

  
  
“Yes.”

  
  
“How did you get these?” she asked, her face flickering momentarily to amusement as she looked at what Barry figured was probably the winning shot of him looking terribly dazed in the pile of garbage cans and bags.

 

“They randomly started printing off my printer earlier,” said Barry.

 

That cleared the amusement from Caitlin’s face.

 

“You mean…” she said, looking up with wide eyes.

  
  
“Captain Cold was near his place!” exploded Cisco. “What if he comes by mine next? I don’t have super speed or healing! AUGH, I still can’t believe he lives in my neighbourhood.”

  
  
“Probably not for long,” said Caitlin before going back to flipping through the small stack of papers.

  
“Why?”

  
  
“I doubt he’d want his enemies to know where he lives,” she said casually. “He’ll probably move.”

  
  
“Do you think so??” asked Cisco, suddenly looking so very hopeful.

  
  
“Maybe?” said Caitlin.

  
  
She got to the last page and her brow furrowed all over again. Cisco hadn’t gotten that far. She showed it to him and Barry waited for their responses. The last sheet of paper was a daytime photo of the garbage cans still toppled over and looking quite dented. It had text under it that said “YOU OWE ME NEW GARBAGE CANS” in all capital letters.

 

“Do you think he’s mad?” asked Barry. “What do you think he means by that? I can’t tell if it’s menacing or some kind of sick joke. Do you think he’s going to do more?”

 

“I think it means you owe him new garbage cans,” said Caitlin with a giggle.

 

Barry narrowed his eyes at her, because _seriously??_

 

“This is serious, _Snow_!” growled Cisco, obviously feeling the same as Barry.

 

“Of course,” she said, biting her lips together. “Well, Barry, it is hard to say. We’ll probably just have to wait and see how it plays out. We’ll have to be on the alert, but this… this seems like he’s playing with you.”

 

“Okay, I honestly don’t know if that’s better or worse,” said Cisco.

 

“Well, what I _do_ know is that we need some tape,” said Caitlin, rifling through the stack of papers and taking out a specific sheet to hold up for Barry and Cisco to see. “Because _this_ is going up on the wall.”

 

Barry groaned. Cisco actually had the audacity to chuckle before opening his desk drawer and pulling out a roll of tape to hand to Caitlin. She smiled at him in thanks and trotted off to tape it to the glass window separating the rooms of the lab.

  
  
It was then that the printer on top of the counter suddenly came to life. Barry and Cisco both jumped and stared at each other with eyes wide.

 

“Cisco,” said Barry, quietly. “Did you just start printing something?”

 

“You know I didn’t,” whispered Cisco.

 

“Oh no,” breathed Barry.

 

They stayed frozen in place, staring at each other in horror until the printer was done printing. Then, Barry watched as Cisco very reluctantly pushed his office chair over to the printer and picked up the piece of paper.

 

“What is it?” asked Barry.

 

Cisco looked down at it for a moment, a frown pulling the corners of his mouth down dramatically. That was all Barry needed to know that Leonard Snart was just outside the building, remotely accessing their _very_ password protected printer. He could zip out there right then and confront the man. He could find out for himself where he stood with the infamous criminal. He _really_ didn’t want to at the moment, though.

 

“CAITLIN!” yelled Cisco.

 

She came back to the room a beat later, tape in hand, smile on her face.

 

“Yes?” she asked.

 

“Can I stay at your place tonight?” asked Cisco, passing her the paper that he had just taken from the printer.

 

Caitlin scoffed at that, but she looked down at the paper and frowned.

 

Barry pushed off from the counter and walked over. Caitlin handed him the paper. Barry’s forehead wrinkled as he looked at it. It was that week’s flyer for a local hardware store. Garbage cans were on sale.

 

Caitlin laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to brodeurbunny for betaing this chapter! WOO!  
> I feel like it is important for you all to know how often I accidentally typed SHART when I went to type SNART in this fic.  
> BETAing is IMPORTANT.


	3. "Cheeky"

 

 

“This is stupid,” grumbled Cisco.

 

Barry smiled ruefully. Cisco had grumbled the entire way across town to the big hardware store. Barry handed him the flyer print off before grabbing one of the over-sized shopping carts at the side of the entrance.

 

As they stepped fully into the large hardware store, they were approached by a greeter.

 

“Hello, welcome to Handyman Hardware” she said, smiling brightly at them before glancing expectantly at the paper in Cisco’s hand. “Are you coming in for anything in particular?”

 

“Humiliation,” replied Cisco under his breath, only loud enough that Barry heard him.

 

Barry snickered.

 

“We’re looking for your garbage cans that are on sale this week,” said Barry.

 

“Oh,” she said, still smiling. “Isn’t that a great deal? They’re down aisle 4.”

 

She pointed the direction and Barry thanked her before pushing the cart that way. Cisco dragged his feet beside him muttering to himself about traipsing all the way to the suburbs to buy a super villain new garbage cans. Barry rolled his eyes.

 

“Need anything while we’re here?” he asked as they walked down the aisle.

 

“A new address?” offered Cisco.

 

“I doubt he likes living two blocks from you any better than you do,” offered Barry. “And that’s _if_ he even knows _or cares_ where you live.”

 

“Yes, well of the two of us he’ll be the one who uses the knowledge for _nefarious_ purposes,” said Cisco. “And why are we even doing this? We’re just giving in to the demands of a criminal, now?”  
  
“It _was_ my fault they got all dented up,” said Barry with a shrug.

 

“They’re just garbage cans,” said Cisco shaking his head. “I think he can afford to replace a couple garbage cans if a few dents hurt his sensibilities so much. According to the news, he just made… what… 5 mill last week?”

 

Barry stopped the cart when they reached the garbage cans. Cisco wordlessly held up the flyer print-out so they could both check that they were getting the correct can.

 

“The news didn’t _say_ anything about that being the work of Captain Cold and his Rogues,” argued Barry. A sudden strange feeling came over him as he realized how much it sounded like he was defending the guy. They both knew it wouldn’t have been anyone else as it fit Snart’s M-O perfectly. “Anyway, do you honestly want to owe Snart anything? Even garbage cans?” he finished lamely.

 

“You have a point,” sighed Cisco.

 

Barry nodded, relieved at not being called out. He turned his attention to the garbage cans. There were a _lot_ of different styles of garbage containers -- a surprising amount. Barry scanned over the product numbers on the shelves.

 

“It’s that one,” he finally said when he found the correct garbage can sitting on the other side of where Cisco was standing.

 

“I’m still mad that he got into the STAR Labs network. I feel all violated and emasculated and other ‘ated’ things,” said Cisco, dropping the paper in the cart and moving over to pick up the stack of cans. “I called Felicity last night and asked her to come up to help me beef up our security.”

 

Barry helped him pull two garbage cans from the stack. He set them in the shopping cart and then went back to the handle to push it to the cashier.

 

“That’s a good idea,” said Barry, nodding. “When is Felicity coming?”

 

“Tomorrow,” said Cisco. “And before you ask, no, Mcqueen isn’t coming with her.”

 

“Why would I--” started Barry, but Cisco was quick to cut him off.

 

“ _Everyone_ knows about your colossal crush, Barry,” said Cisco with an exaggerated roll of his eyes.

 

“I don’t have… it’s not… what do you,” sputtered Barry, face going hot. Cisco was grinning at him with a raised eyebrow. Barry slumped and let out a puff of breath. “Well, it’s not _colossal_.”

 

Cisco threw his head back and laughed brightly, which was a nice change from his moping and whining all morning --even if it _was_ at Barry’s expense.

 

“It’s okay, Barry,” said Cisco, patting his shoulder. “Everyone loves a bad boy.”

 

Barry huffed, but his face only grew warmer.

 

“Oooh,” said Cisco. “Can we walk through the lights aisle on the way? I _love_ walking under all the lights.”

 

Barry laughed.

 

“Sure, man,” he said, grinning. “But after that, we gotta hurry. I wanna deliver these beauties before my afternoon shift starts.”  
  


\--------

 

It was mid-morning of day two of lying low. Leonard was sitting at his table looking at real estate listings on his phone. It wouldn’t be long until he got antsy for another job, but for now he was enjoying the break. Of course, if he decided to move, the pause between jobs may be prolonged. Team Flash learning of his private residence had thrown a bit of a wrench in his timeline. Leonard smirked to himself wondering what Barry thought of the surveillance screencaps and flyer he sent to his and STAR labs’ printers the day before.

 

It was then that his tablet dinged notifying him that movement had been detected on his property and was being recorded. Not overly concerned, as it could be something as benign as a cat wandering across his lawn, Len set down his phone and reached for the tablet. As he unlocked it, a crash sounded from behind his house. Len stood abruptly, tablet still in hand, and moved to lean against the wall beside the back window so he was covered. He unlocked the tablet with quick, precise movements and saw it was Barry Allen, or rather, the Flash (he was suited up), awkwardly setting up the garbage cans. The crash must have been him knocking them over.

 

“What is your _predilection_ with my garbage cans, Barry Allen,” he murmured to himself before swiping through the views from the other cameras in the back.

 

It was then that he realized Barry was actually switching the dented garbage cans out for two brand new ones. The kid had actually purchased brand new ones to replace the ones he had dented. Seeing it wasn’t an immediate threat, Leonard relaxed and turned to properly look out the back window. It was just in time to see Barry finish with the cans and then disappear in a streak, leaving little sparks of static lightning in his wake.

 

Was the kid really such a goody-two-shoes that he couldn’t live with the fact that he had damaged someone’s garbage cans? Or was he actually so afraid of Captain Cold that he’d listen to him when he demanded them be replaced? Neither seemed right. Neither seemed like the Barry Allen who glared at Leonard and pushed him up against walls when he was upset, nor the Barry Allen who would grit his teeth and demand Leonard let Barry help him out of a bad situation.

 

Leonard set down the tablet and strolled leisurely out the back door to investigate the new garbage cans. He pursed his lips when he reached them and found both cans wearing bright red bows. From one of the bows hung a tag with “compliments of Team Flash” written on it and a smiley face drawn just below.

 

“Cheeky,” said Leonard, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

 

He stood and looked at the garbage cans for a few beats, just taking it in. Then, he pulled the ribbons and tag off the cans and shoved them in his pocket before he walked back inside. He still felt a frisson of disbelief over the fact that _the Flash_ had actually gone out and purchased him new garbage cans when he had really just been messing with him by demanding them be replaced. Yet, Barry had even gotten the exact ones Leonard had chosen and sent the flyer for. The red ribbon and tag were a nice touch. They showed him Barry wasn’t actually doing this out of fear of him. That was one thing he liked about Barry; that he wasn’t afraid to push back.

 

Lisa was inside when Leonard got back in. He tensed when he found her standing in his kitchen, but made sure not to show his surprise. It wasn’t a hard task as her back was to him during his initial reaction. She was rifling through his cupboards.

 

“Looking for cookies?” he asked in his trademarked deadpan that said he was not impressed.

 

She startled which gave him a small bit of satisfaction considering how off-balanced he felt. Her showing up unannounced wasn’t unusual, but the fact that she had _just_ missed the Flash was what had him feeling ruffled. He glanced over at his tablet where he had left it on the counter. The screen was locked. Lisa didn’t know the code. He felt relieved she hadn’t seen the footage that would have popped up the moment the tablet was unlocked.

 

“Cookies… granola bars… dry pasta... rat poison…” she listed, turning to him with a smirk. “I’m not picky when I’m starving.”

 

Leonard scoffed at that. His eyes then suddenly zeroing in on his phone in her hand. A wave of cold panic washed over him, his hand automatically going to his pocket where his phone should have been. He had been so distracted by Barry that he had left his phone out. Sloppy.

 

“Well, sister dearest, perhaps we should go get lunch,” he said evenly, trying not to giveaway any anxiety at his phone being in her possession.

 

Lisa grinned triumphantly.

 

 _Shit._ She knew something. Leonard frowned at her and reached to take the phone. She let it go easily. Leonard leaned into her space and narrowed his eyes. She stared right back at him, grin still in place, and raised an eyebrow in obvious challenge.

 

Leonard let out a huff and looked down at the phone. The screen was open to the real estate listings he had been perusing before the interruption. The phone, just like his tablet, was set to lock after one minute of disuse. Lisa didn’t have that code either.

 

“You figured out my lock screen code,” he said.

 

“I want a big, juicy burger,” was the only thing Lisa said in reply.

 

Leonard turned away from her, walking toward the front door, knowing she’d follow. He typed a code into the keypad by the door to fully arm the house.

 

“I thought you said you weren’t picky,” he quipped as he opened the front door.

 

\--------------

 

“So,” said Lisa leadingly once the waiter had left with their orders.

 

Leonard leaned back in the booth and gave her an expectant look. Lisa rolled her eyes.

 

“Sooo...,” she said after a few beats. “Gonna tell me why you’re looking into real estate? Planning on doing some investing? What’s up, Lenny?”

 

Leonard let out a sigh and leaned forward placing his forearms on the table between them.

 

“I’ll be changing my phone’s password,” he said.

 

“That’s probably wise as it was _really easy_ to crack,” she said with a sharp smile.

 

“It was my fault to leave it out in the open _in my own home_ ,” offered Leonard slowly, making sure the statement was dripping with sarcasm. Mostly to cover his own humiliation of having been distracted enough to _have_ left it out in the first place.

 

Lisa put her elbow on the table and leaned her chin against her fist. She was giving him a very expectant look. Leonard sighed. She wasn’t going to drop it.

 

“I’m thinking about moving,” he finally revealed.

 

Lisa sat up looking immediately worried, her cocky attitude falling away.

 

“Lenny,” she whispered. “Who found you?”

 

“Nothing like that,” said Leonard. “I just think it’s time to move. Don’t want to get too friendly with the neighbours.”

 

“So, everything’s okay?” asked Lisa looking disbelieving. “We’re not in danger? Listen, Lenny, you know you’ve still got three safe houses --four if you count the one in Oregon. We could get Mick and pack you up and be outta here tonight.”

 

“Everything is fine,” said Leonard. “If there was a problem, we’d already be out. You know I don’t do sloppy.”

 

“Right,” said Lisa slowly, eyeing him critically.

 

Leonard leaned back in the booth and focused on giving off an air of unconcern. He truly wasn’t worried about Team Flash knowing where he lived --at least, not at the moment. He knew he had to move now that they knew, but it wasn’t a rush. It wasn’t an immediate danger.

 

“Well,” said Lisa, “if you’re going house shopping, then I’m coming with you.”

 

“Is that so?”

 

“Yeah, we can be like those dumb couples on House Hunters who are looking for a house to buy and have these wild lists of ‘necessities’ and these huge budgets.”

 

“You want to play house,” deadpanned Leonard.

 

“Lighten up, Lenny,” laughed Lisa. “It’ll be fun!”

 

“Can’t wait.”

 

\------------

 

Barry slid into STAR labs the next morning, hoping to say ‘hi’ to Felicity and, of course, get a little ‘heroing’ in before he had to be at work.

 

“Okay, all set, Cisco,” said Felicity from where she was sitting next to Cisco at the computers.  
  
“All set for what?” asked Barry.

 

“Hi, Barry!” said Felicity, smiling brightly and standing to give Barry a hug. Barry grinned and pulled her in tight. It was always so good to see her --especially when outside of emergencies. “And before you ask, Ollie didn’t come with me.”

 

“Why would I--”

 

“It’s okay that you have a crush on him, Barry,” said Felicity, patting him on the arm. “I mean, _believe me_ , I get it.”

 

“Ok _what_ ?!” exclaimed Barry. “ _Why_ is everyone _on_ about this this week?”

 

Felicity giggled and Barry stuck his lower lip out in a pout. He looked over at Cisco with disbelief. Cisco just grinned and shrugged. Barry gave him a light-hearted glare before walking over to the computers.

 

“So what are you guys up to?” he asked.  
  
“Oh this’ll be good,” said Cisco. “We got Cold’s phone number from when he remote printed that flyer. I still can’t believe he got into our network.”  
  
“How _did_ he get into our network?” asked Barry. “He’s smart, but he doesn’t strike me as a particularly skilled hacker.”

 

“That’s just it!” exclaimed Cisco, looking immediately angry. “He didn’t, Barry! He _guessed_ my password! It wasn’t even a weak password. It was a good one. I promise!”

  


“It was pretty good,” offered Felicity, her face a mask of computer nerd solidarity.

  


“He guessed it,” questioned Barry in surprise.

  


“Must have. He just typed it in with no hacking whatsoever. So, I got Felicity here to change all our passwords,” said Cisco, with a grin.

  


“I switched to computer generated passwords for extra security,” said Felicity. “Something I’m a bit surprised Cisco here hadn’t done already.”

 

Cisco rolled his eyes good-naturedly. He tapped a neon green sticky note on the desk with his index finger where all the new passwords were written down. “So, we gotta memorize this gobbledygook. No way can _Creepy_ Cold guess _these_ passwords from gathering intel on us.”

 

“Awesome,” said Barry, nodding.  
  
“Are you guys ready?” asked Caitlin, coming in from the other room. “I haven’t missed it, right?”

 

“You haven’t missed it. We’re ready now, though,” said Felicity with an excited grin. “Cisco, care to do the honours?”

 

“Aw, don’t mind if I do,” said Cisco, the same excited grin spread across his face.

 

“What’s happening?” murmured Barry to Caitlin as she came to stand by him.

 

“They have Snart’s phone number,” said Caitlin with a smile and an eyeroll. “And are going to use it to prank call him.”

 

“That’ll teach him for breaking into my network--”

 

“Guessing your password,” offered Felicity with a teasing grin.

 

“Whatever!” exclaimed Cisco, clicking around on the computer to get the call set up. “Point is, he is about to feel the wrath of Team Flash! Okay, I rigged Wells’ conference phone to my computer, so it’s on speaker. That means you all have to be quiet.”

 

“This is so exciting,” whispered Felicity, grinning and shaking her fists in excitement.

 

Everyone held their breath when the phone began to ring after Cisco had typed in the phone number on his computer. Barry couldn’t believe this was their life, now.

 

“Yes,” answered Snart after two rings, voice clipped. Something strange twisted in Barry’s stomach at it.

 

“Hello, sir,” spoke Cisco in a ridiculous voice, chin raised, and a sales person’s smile on his face. He was definitely in character. “Can you tell me, is your refrigerator running?”  
  
Barry covered his mouth and leaned forward with the momentum of the sudden laugh that wanted to escape. He could see Caitlin covering her mouth out of the corner of his eye. Everyone waited in anticipation for Snart’s answer, but he was silent on the other end. Cisco looked over to Barry with wide eyes. Barry bit his lips together to keep from laughing and motioned for him to go on.

 

“Uh, i-i-if it is,” he continued, stuttering a moment but regaining his stupid salesperson voice quickly. “I would say that you should go out and catch it.”

 

Everyone held perfectly still for a beat, when no response from Snart was immediately forthcoming, Cisco ended the call. The room burst into laughter. Cisco was grinning from ear to ear.

 

“BOOM! That’ll teach him,” he said triumphantly.  


“That was horrible, Cisco,” laughed Felicity. “Truly atrocious! You should be ashamed ...I approve.”

 

Barry shook his head, chuckling.

 

“I can’t believe you just did that,” he said. “That was literally the stupidest thing ever.”

 

“We’re doing this again,” said Cisco with authority. “Give it a bit and then one of you is going to prank call him. We are going to make him _miserable_ .”  
  
“Do you honestly think he’s going to answer a call from our number again after _that_ ?” asked Caitlin around a laugh.  
  
“Felicity helped rig up the computer to send the call from multiple different numbers,” said Cisco. “It’ll look like the call is coming from a different number each time we call. He’s a criminal for hire, he won’t be able to afford to ignore phone calls. I guarantee it.”

 

“Okay, okay,” said Felicity. “I call dibs on the next call, I want a turn before I have to head back to Starling City.”

 

“Be my guest,” said Barry laughing and raising his hands. “You guys are insane.”

 

“Oh, you’ll have a turn Barry Allen, so you better be ready,” said Cisco, pointing an accusing finger Barry’s way. “This is all your fault after all.”

 

“What happened to you wanting to repress this whole thing and move on?” asked Barry with a smirk to cover up the instant nerves that ran through his system at the idea of having to prank call Snart.

 

“You don’t mess with a man’s network, Barry,” said Cisco. “It’s sacred.”

 

“This sudden bravado wouldn’t have anything to do with Felicity beefing up our security systems, would it?” asked Caitlin, before sending a wink Barry’s way. Barry laughed.

 

“You two can shut it,” said Cisco pointing between Caitlin and Barry. “Felicity gets dibs on the next call, but you two better be thinking up some good prank calls because, like I said, you’re next Barry... and Caitlin, for your sass, you can go after.”

  
Barry opened his mouth to respond but suddenly a small alarm sounded from the computer. Cisco’s grin turned serious. He turned to the computer and clicked on the mouse a few times.  
  
“High-speed chase heading North toward the Port Mann Bridge,” spoke Cisco seriously without looking up from the computer.  
  
Barry didn’t need to hear anything more. He was rushing off to put on his suit and speed to the scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HUGE thank you to my beta, brodeurbunny who put up with a lot of garbage from me during her time betaing this chapter. She helped me turn it from brain diarrhea into something that I'm proud of and I hope you all found enjoyable to read. 
> 
>  
> 
> \--------------
> 
> Some quotes from our conversations while going through the google doc...
> 
> Me: "THAT wasn't a continuity mistake, that was an EXAMPLE of how NOVEL this is for him!!"  
> Me: "IT WAS ALL ON PURPOSE!"  
> Her: "Gosh."  
> Her: "How would he have seen it, they went down 4 aisles"  
> Me: "YOU'RE RUINING MY LIIIIIFE!!!"
> 
> \--------------
> 
> Me: "I DON'T CARE, I NEED HIM TO SAY IT!!!"  
> Her: "Okay fine, you're the author, you gotta have your weird needs."  
> Her: "Just do whatever."  
> Me: "LISTEN, hot dudes saying big words with perfect enunciation is a turn on mmmkay!?"  
> Her: "I CAN TELL"
> 
> \--------------
> 
> Please... everyone... thank brodeurbunny30 for putting up with me long enough to actually get this chapter edited.


	4. Barry does NOT Fixate

Leonard pulled up to the curb to park behind the real estate agent’s car. The agent was just getting out, folder in hand. She smiled and waved at him. He nodded to her as he put the car in park.

 

“This is going to be fun,” said Lisa from the passenger seat.

  
  
Leonard grunted in response. He stayed seated as she got out first and headed over to join the real estate agent who was waiting for them at the path up to the house. Leonard needed a moment.

 

Lisa had shown up at his house that morning holding a large coffee and looking much too alert considering the early hour. In fact, Leonard had scheduled the house viewing as early as he had in hopes that Lisa would sleep in and miss it. Instead, he’d have to both suffer the early hour and her caffeinated enthusiasm. Wonderful.

 

Her punctuality wasn’t the only thing that was foreign about her when she walked into his kitchen that morning. She was dressed as if she were on her way to some sort of book club meeting, or perhaps an interview at a bank; light sweater, trousers, chunky necklace. She had been saying something about looking the part. Right. _The HGTV thing_. It grated on him that she looked so approving when she saw that he had also dressed up. Though his choice of wearing the button up and fitted chinos had nothing to do with living out some fantasy appearance on a reality TV show. He just needed to look the part.

 

Leonard frowned to himself before taking a deep breath and getting out of the car.

 

“So, as I was telling your spouse,” said the agent, Cynthia she had called herself. “This place has two bedrooms, two bathrooms, and an unfinished basement which gives you lots of room for growth in the future.”

 

The way she said growth and eyed Lisa made Leonard shudder at the implied “growth” she was talking about.

  
  
“She’s not my spouse,” said Leonard in deadpan.   


Lisa frowned at him, her lips pushing out in the beginnings of a pout. He would let her play her little dress up game and come along to be a nuisance while he looked at houses, but he drew the line at implications of them starting a family together.  


“Oh, uh girlfriend?” said Cynthia with an awkward laugh.

 

“Sister,” said Leonard. “She’s just along for the ride.”

 

“OH!” said Cynthia looking embarrassed, but being quick to move on with a new sales pitch, which Leonard could begrudgingly respect. “Well, the unfinished basement still leaves you with options and if you do finish it, an increase in equity when it comes time to resell.”

 

“Hmm,” hummed Leonard cooly.

 

“Shall we go have a look?” asked Cynthia with bright enthusiasm.

  
  
Leonard motioned for her to go ahead. She nodded with a bright, fake smile and lead the way up the walk to the front door. Leonard glanced around the front of the property as he waited for her to open the key lock hanging from the door handle. It was simple and tidy, with no extra landscaping that would need upkeep. He approved.

 

“Wow, this place has so much great light, look at all those windows, Lenny!” exclaimed Lisa as they stepped into the house.

  
  
Leonard frowned. His sister really was determined to play this out like an episode of House Hunters. There were too many windows; it’d be no good for fortification.

 

“Oh, but these carpets have to go,” said Lisa shaking her head and frowning in exaggeration. Leonard lifted an eyebrow. She grinned and leaned into him to whisper, “imagine the static electricity if you have your scarlet buddy over to visit.”

 

Leonard frowned. Did she… there was no way she knew. How did…? But no... no, he hadn’t told her and if she had found out on her own, she wouldn’t have had the patience or subtlety to hint at it. He’d know if she knew… he hoped.

 

“So, it’s an open concept kitchen,” said Cynthia, handing both Lisa and Leonard printouts of the listing and floor plan. “There’s the main bathroom down the hall and both bedrooms. The master has an ensuite which is the second full bathroom.”

 

She walked away from them like she expected them to follow. Lisa was quick to do just that, still having fun playing her game even if she had been downgraded from spouse to sister. Leonard needed _another_ minute. He stood in the ‘great light’ of the living room and let the conversation between Lisa and Cynthia fall to the background. He wanted to concentrate on the house’s strengths and weaknesses which was frustrating enough with a real estate agent blathering on while his sister pretended they were normal homebuyers. He didn’t need the added distraction of wondering what his sister was up to bringing up Barry Allen like that.

 

Of course, that was when his phone lit up with a call. Thanks to Team Flash, he had been receiving prank calls on and off since the morning before. He couldn’t ignore his phone though, not if it was a potential client or Rogue emergency. With a frown of distaste he took a breath and answered the call.

 

“Yes,” he said perhaps more gruffly than usual.

 

“H-hi!” stuttered a voice that sounded suspiciously like Barry Allen.

 

There was a heavy pause on the other end before Barry’s poorly disguised voice started up again, overloud and overbright.

 

“Are you interested in a free duct cleaning and furnace assessment?”   
  
It was the first prank call he’d received where it had been Barry doing the talking. Leonard took a moment to wonder at how he was so quick to recognize Barry over the phone, but ultimately decided it’d be safer not to prod at that thought until later. It was obvious from the slight echo to the call that the kid had him on speaker.

 

“What would that entail?” asked Leonard instead of immediately hanging up like he had the last three times Team Flash had prank called him. The first call had been so surprising that he’d stayed on the line until they’d hung up. He had also stayed on the line for the second prank call simply out of curiosity, but the third, fourth, and fifth had pressed his patience. This one would have likely gotten the same treatment had it not been Barry himself on the line.

 

“Oh.. uh.. I-it’d be a uh… just a morning or afternoon thing. We’d send out one of our uh... agents? And, uh, clean your ducts and change your furnace filter. Y-y-you know the.. uh.. residue in air ducts is a, uh, a major cause of asthma and respiratory diseases so it is important to keep that uh.. stuff.. clean.”

 

“Respiratory diseases, of course,” said Leonard slowly. “We wouldn’t want that.”

 

“Right.”

 

“When is your next opening?” asked Leonard. “I’d like to schedule this free cleaning and have you over to assess my… what was it?”

 

“Ducts,” stuttered Barry.

 

Leonard smirked.

 

“Right,” he said. “Will you personally be making the home visit? If so, I’d like to make sure I’m home. Wouldn’t want to… miss this _assessment_.”

 

“Err,” stuttered Barry. Leonard’s smirk grew.

 

“Lenny,” called Lisa from the other. “Are you seriously on the phone? Come check out this master bedroom!”

 

Leonard frowned and pressed his fingers to his temple.

 

“I have to go, let me know when you have an _opening_ ,” said Leonard. “Have a nice day… _Barry_.”

 

He ended the call and put the phone back in his pocket. He smiled to himself. Perhaps that would be enough to curb the prank calls. It had at least been enough to brighten his irritating morning.

  


\-------

 

Barry sat there staring at the computer screen for a few beats after Snart had ended the call. He slowly turned to Caitlin and Cisco to find them both frozen in place; Caitlin wide-eyed and blushing, Cisco looking a strange mix of disgusted and mortified.

  
  
“Well,” breathed Cisco after a few moments of heavy silence. “I guess we’re done with that game.”

 

“Yep,” managed Barry though his voice came out sounding strangled.

 

Barry cleared his throat before getting up from his seat at Cisco’s computer. He glanced at the time and was relieved to see it was nearly time to leave for the station. Something very strange had started happening in his stomach during the call to Snart. It began at the man’s growled ‘yes’ and had only grown worse with the innuendo of his voice throughout the call. By the time Snart had said Barry’s name at the end of the call, Barry was nearly done for.

 

“I should… I should get to work,” said Barry, pointing toward the door.

 

As if Barry’s words had broken some sort of spell and reanimated them, both Caitlin and Cisco jumped into motion. Awkwardly moving around each other.

  
  
“Right, yeah,” said Cisco, nodding and pointing awkwardly toward the door. “I should, uh, get back to the… thing.”

 

“Yes, right,” sputtered Caitlin, nearly running into Cisco in her hurry to leave. “I too... have a... thing!”

 

“Have a good day at work, Barry,” she called.

 

“Thanks,” muttered Barry before heading out.  


Barry tried to push Snart from his mind as he ran to the station. He was still feeling ruffled and at odds with himself by the time he arrived. Luckily, (and perhaps that was in poor taste) there was a crime scene to keep his mind busy.

 

The crime scene ended up putting him in a much worse mood.  It always frustrated him to work on scenes as a CI that had arisen from situations he had not even known about as the Flash. Fast as he was, he wasn’t omniscient nor could he be in every place at once. Still, it felt like a major failing on his part that three people had been killed the night before while he had been asleep in bed.  

 

After work, Barry turned down Joe’s invitation to dinner at his place and instead headed back to STAR Labs. He had so much to juggle in life, that he rarely popped back in to STAR Labs after work when there was not an active metahuman threat. The only times that he did were when a crime scene at work had spooked him into wanting to do more ‘superheroing’ that day.  

 

“Bad day at work?” Cisco asked.

 

“Three people killed down by the docks,” said Barry, dropping down in one of the computer chairs. “A drug deal gone bad, but…”

 

“It still sucks that they died and you weren’t there to stop it,” said Cisco. “You can’t be everywhere at once, Barry.”

 

“I know,” said Barry around a sigh.

 

They were quiet for a minute before Cisco clapped his hands together.

 

“Well,” he said brightly. “Let’s see what sorts of illegal activity I can find for you tonight.”

 

Barry smiled in relief and stood so Cisco could get to the computer. He watched as Cisco clicked through his collection of tracking and system monitoring apps.

 

“Break in on 1st and Cook Street,” reported Cisco moments later.

  
Barry grinned and took off, grabbing his suit and speeding across town to the scene.

 

Over the course of the evening, he managed to save a family and their cat from a house fire, stop two armed robberies, and even stop a mugging in an alley on his way back from the second robbery. Now, he was back at STAR labs in his civilian clothes, feeling much lighter having done some good. He was listening to Cisco’s excited explanation of his latest invention when they got an alert through the computer from the employee entrance.

 

“Who could that be?” asked Cisco, dropping his feet from the desk and sitting up. He rolled his computer chair over to the computer monitor to bring up the security cameras. “Did you order pizza?”

 

“No?” said Barry, brow furrowing. He got up and walked over to look over Cisco’s shoulder at the monitor. A pizza delivery guy was standing outside holding a pizza.

 

“Think it’s a trap?” asked Cisco.

 

“I’ll go check it out,” said Barry before running off.

  
  
  


“Hey,” said the pizza guy right when Barry opened the front door. “I’ve got your pizza order.”

 

“Sorry, uh, I didn’t order any pizza,” said Barry going for polite even while scanning the area suspiciously.

 

The guy looked honestly surprised by that. He looked down at the printed receipt on the top of the pizza box.

 

“You not Barry Allen?” he asked.

 

“No, I am,” said Barry. “It’s just tha--”

 

“Then it’s your pizza,” he said with a shrug and handed it over.

 

“Err, okay,” said Barry, taking the oversized pizza box as there was nothing else he could do with the man was shoving it into his hands. “How much do I owe you?”

 

“It was ordered and paid for online, even included tip,” said the guy with a shrug and a grin. “Have a good night.”

 

“Yeah, okay, uh, you too?” Barry called after him, bewildered.

 

Barry watched as the guy trotted down the steps and got in his car. As the car peeled away, Barry shook his head and went back inside. He eyed the pizza box suspiciously as he walked back into the main room.

 

“So?” asked Cisco.

 

“The pizza was apparently bought and paid for online... and addressed to Barry Allen,” said Barry feeling his stomach growl as the aroma of greasy pizza filled his senses.

 

“Hmm,” said Cisco. They both eyed the pizza box. “Think Joe sent it since you turned down his offer of supper at his place?”

 

“How did you--”

 

“It’s Wednesday, Barry,” said Cisco with a smile and an eyeroll. “You’re predictable.”

 

“I gotta work on that,” said Barry with a rueful laugh.

 

He opened the pizza box to find an extra-large, deluxe pizza covered in extra toppings. Cisco was licking his lips. Barry chuckled, but froze when he saw the writing in black marker on the inside of the lid.

 

“Thanks for the garbage cans?” read Cisco. “ARE YOU SERIOUS?”

 

“Well,” said Barry, his stomach flipping. “I guess we know who paid for the pizza.”

 

Cisco whined. “Now we can’t eat it.”

 

“Why?” asked Barry.

 

“It’s probably poisoned or something.”

 

“I highly doubt it,” said Barry laughing despite himself. “It isn’t like Snart hand-delivered it.”

 

“Yeah, well--”

 

The front door buzzed.

 

“What the hell?” muttered Cisco, rushing over to the computer to check the security again. “It’s another pizza guy.”

 

“What?” yelped Barry.

 

“Another. Pizza. Guy.”

 

“I’m going,” grumbled Barry, setting the open pizza box down on the desk before sprinting off.

 

“Barry Allen?” asked the guy wearing an orange and red baseball cap with ‘Mamma’s Pizzeria’ embroidered on the front.

 

“Yes,” confirmed Barry.

 

“I’ve got an extra-large deluxe here with extra cheese and extra sausage,” he said, handing over the pizza box.

 

“I didn’t order any pizza,” sighed Barry.

 

“Must be your lucky day,” he said with a shrug. “She’s bought and paid for.”

 

“Thanks,” said Barry holding the pizza in one hand and reaching to his back pocket for his wallet. “Tip?”

 

“Got a generous one via the online order,” said the guy. “Have a good night.”

 

“You too,” said Barry.

 

Cisco was eating a slice of the first pizza when Barry arrived with the second. Barry raised an eyebrow at him.

 

“Hey,” said Cisco. “You said yourself that it was probably fine and I couldn’t just let the pizza go to waste.”

 

Barry laughed and set down the second pizza. He opened the box to see if there was writing inside its lid as well. There was no message. He shrugged and took a slice.

 

It was about ten minutes later that the front door buzzed again.

 

“Are you serious?” exclaimed Cisco, mouth full of his second slice of pizza. “I’m calling Caitlin, we’re going to need help eating all these pizzas.”

 

He looked up at Barry and rolled his eyes.

 

“Okay, maybe _you_ don’t need help eating a lot pizza, but we should definitely share the wealth.”

 

Barry left to answer the door while Cisco made the call.

 

\----

 

It was late by the time the pizza deliveries finally stopped.   
  
“You know, it’s funny how well Snart timed it that each pizza would arrive between ten and fifteen minutes apart. Just long enough in between to be irritating,” said Caitlin, picking at a slice of pizza. “Especially considering each pizza place would take a different amount of time to get here from different parts of town.”

 

“Naw,” said Barry, leaning against the wall where he was sitting on the floor across the room. He felt lethargic with the amount of pizza he had eaten. “This is nothing for him, he’s _obsessed_ with timing. You should hear him on jobs; he’s all ‘243 seconds until sirens’ this, and ‘don’t deviate from the schedule’ that, and ‘Flash, so nice of you to drop in’... err wait.”

 

Barry glanced up to see both Caitlin and Cisco looking at him with raised eyebrows. Cisco’s mouth was hanging open.

 

“What?” asked Barry feeling suddenly defensive.

 

“We _do_ hear him at jobs, Barry,” said Cisco tapping just under his own ear to indicate Barry’s bluetooth in his suit. “But unlike _you_ , we don’t fixate on the guy.”

 

“I do _not_ fixate,” argued Barry.

 

“Anyway,” said Cisco, taking another bite of pizza and talking with his mouth full. Barry scrunched his nose at him. “I’m not complaining or anything, but I gotta point out that this was a pretty lame prank. I mean, sending huge amounts of pizza to a man with the world’s fastest metabolism? Seems more like an expensive gift than a prank. Eighteen pizzas from eighteen different pizza places… that’s just showing off. And he prepaid for the food, _with tip!_ Classic pizza order pranks are all about being stuck with the bill.”

 

“Answering the door to a pizza delivery every ten minutes was kind of a pain,” offered Barry weakly, even while internally questioning himself as to why he was sticking up for Snart’s pranking abilities.

 

“Yeah,” said Cisco.

 

“Here’s the real question,” said Caitlin. “How did Snart know you’d be here tonight?”

 

“Oh,” said Cisco, face twisting like he bit into something sour. “Dude, _that’s_ creepy.”

 

“Lucky guess?” offered Barry, though his stomach was doing that flip flop thing again.

 

It definitely _wasn’t_ a lucky guess. Snart had to have known somehow. He wouldn’t have invested so much into the prank to have Barry not even be there. Snart was the type to know the movements of his enemies, but Barry usually spent Wednesday nights at Joe’s. Was Snart watching him? Why did that give him a small thrill instead of creeping him out?  

 

“We need to prank him, again,” said Barry with faked enthusiasm. He got to his feet to pace. “What should we do? Saran wrap his toilet? Short sheet his bed? Hmm… no… those both involved getting inside his house and we now know it has some serious security.” He paused and looked over at Caitlin and Cisco. “Guys? Any ideas?”

 

He frowned when they shared a look.

 

“Barry,” started Caitlin, gently. “Don’t you think this whole thing is getting a little… weird?”

 

“What do you mean?” said Barry with a tight laugh. “It was weird right from the start!”

 

“I mean,” said Caitlin, wincing. “Don’t you think it’s all getting a little too… _friendly_?”

 

“Friendly,” repeated Barry in confusion.

 

“Leonard Snart is supposed to be our enemy,” said Caitlin with a shrug. “Yet, this all feels a bit like…”

 

“Pigtail pulling?” offered Cisco around another bite of pizza.

 

“I was going to say flirting,” said Caitlin shooting him a look from narrowed eyes before letting out a sigh, “but yes, I _guess_ that works, too.”

 

“What?” exclaimed Barry.

 

“Listen, Barry,” said Caitlin. “It’s okay to have a type, but don’t you think you’re playing with fire just a teensy bit getting so invested in Leonard Snart?”

 

“More like playing with liquid nitrogen,” quipped Cisco around a snort.

 

“A type? ... _Invested_?” choked out Barry.

 

“ _Baby’s got dat bad boy affliction_ ,” singsonged Cisco.

 

“Not helpful, Cisco,” chided Caitlin. Cisco pouted.

 

“Guys, you’re making some seriously wild leaps, here,” said Barry, feeling cornered.

 

“Are we though, Barry?” asked Cisco. “It’s one thing to do a stupid drunk prank, but it’s a _whole_ different thing to keep upping the ante.”

 

“Hey, that’s not just on me,” said Barry, motioning to the pizza. “I’m not the one remotely sending pizza to people.”

 

“Yeah,” said Caitlin, brow furrowing. “What do you think he’s getting out of this?”

 

“Maybe he’s like his sister,” said Cisco looking momentarily regretful. “Likes to flirt just to mess with you.”

 

“I don’t think so...” started Barry, stomach dropping at the thought.

 

“Speaking of Lisa Snart,” continued Cisco. “I obviously can’t fault you for having a crush on the enemy, but Caitlin’s right, you gotta be careful, man. This _is_ getting weird.”

 

“Okay, sure, I’ll be careful,” said Barry with a shrug. “But I _don’t_ fixate.”

 

“And now you’re _fixating_ on the fact that I said you fixate!” said Cisco, punctuating it by pointing with the pizza in his hand.

 

Barry rolled his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please send good vibes to my beta Brodeurbunny who is gonna be SO busy for Chapter Five.


	5. Running Into Trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ahhh daaang... how'd this crack fic get so much plot???

It was Sunday night which meant it had been officially over a week since Leonard had last done a job. And that familiar irritation just under his skin had returned. Even with the completely unexpected and rather amusing tomfoolery between Team Flash and himself, Leonard was antsy for another heist. But, he had a house to buy, fortify and set up security for. He had the annoying task of packing and his old house to sell. Plus there was still the distraction of whatever the hell was up with Barry Allen. So, as restless as he felt to start another job, it would have to wait.    
  
He had an appointment at the bank in the morning and, if all went according to plan, an appointment with a lawyer in the afternoon to sign for the new house. With that in mind and not wanting to waste time, he had started packing that evening. He was methodical with his packing, always starting with non-essentials and making sure everything was properly labeled. Still, he wasn’t a fan of the task in the least.

 

He was just sitting down with a cup of tea after finishing packing another box when his phone began to vibrate with a call. He glanced at it. 

 

Mick was calling. 

 

He hadn’t heard from him in days. Leonard set down his cup  and answered the call.

 

“Hello.”

 

“You don’t know me,” hissed an unfamiliar voice immediately raising Leonard’s hackles. “You don’t know me, but you will. Your partner says you can get him out of the... bind he landed himself in. Warehouse 14. Loading Docks. One hour. Come alone and don’t be late.”

 

The call ended. Leonard sat for a beat, grip too tight on the phone in his hand. 

 

“Damnit, Mick,” he growled under his breath.

 

He stood, shoved the phone in his pocket and went to his room to get his parka. Whatever the  _ hot head _ had gotten himself into, Leonard really didn’t have the patience for it. He pulled on his gloves and grabbed his goggles. He probably should have been checking on Mick over the past week. Mick got bored easily without a job to focus on and wasn’t one to think things through. Instead, Leonard had been busy  _ buying pizza for Team Flash _ . Ridiculous. 

 

Leonard paused after picking up his gun. Despite what was said on the phone, he knew it would be folly not to bring back-up. Lisa was the only one to call in on such short notice and the only person other than Mick he trusted, but if shit was about to go sideways, he’d rather not bring his sister into the thick of it. He didn’t know these guys, didn’t know what Mick had gotten himself into. She would be pissed when she found out that he’d gone alone, but it was the only option. That decided, he left without calling her. They  _ had  _ said to come alone, after all.

 

The Loading Docks were among the shittiest parts of town, an area that Leonard tried to avoid. Only the slimiest criminals with the lowest of standards did their business down there. Leonard hated that the place was always in flux. There were tons of shipping containers and freight trucks coming and going, all sorts of thugs walking about, and many places to hide; all in all, a lot of moving pieces. Leonard considered taking his motorbike, but ultimately decided on his car not knowing what sort of shape Mick would be in. 

 

\-----

 

It was late and Barry was back at his small apartment getting ready for bed when he got a call from Cisco.

 

“Hey Cisco,” said Barry answering the phone.   
  
“I picked up reports of criminal movement down at the warehouses at the loading docks,” said Cisco, not bothering to say hello. “It seemed like it could be related to where the three people were killed the other night, so I thoug--”

 

“I’m on my way!” interrupted Barry, already in action.

 

In a flash, he arrived, suited up and ready, at the scummiest piers of the port city. He skidded to a halt and immediately looked for cover. Even though the docks were quieter at night, they never did sleep; there was always movement somewhere. Barry walked around the side of the nearest warehouse and then down along a line of sea cans. 

 

“Do you know exactly where this was going down?” whispered Barry, touching the bluetooth bolt near his ear. 

 

“Sorry, just something about a warehouse,” came Cisco’s voice.

 

“Right,” replied Barry, but mostly to himself. He turned and eyed the rows and rows of warehouses dubiously. 

 

Distant voices caught his attention and Barry skulked down the nearest row toward them. Staying hidden in the shadows, he found a warehouse being guarded by two unsubtle thugs carrying large, definitely-illegal guns.

 

“Found them,” Barry breathed.

 

He crouched down as headlights approached. They were blinding in the low light. He raised an arm to shield his eyes. The car parked beside the guarded warehouse and shut off. Barry was still blinking and squinting from the lights when the shockingly familiar form of Leonard Snart got out of the car. 

 

“ _ Shit _ ,” hissed Barry, automatically ducking down further.

 

“Wuzzat?” asked Cisco in his ear.

 

“Oh, uh, err… knelt in some fresh bird droppings,” whispered Barry, eyes glued to Snart. 

 

His Captain Cold persona was in full swing. Cold gun in hand, head held high and shoulders back, he walked with purpose. Everything about his gait exuded confidence and power.  

 

“Be careful with my suit, Allen.”

 

“Wha?” murmured Barry, completely distracted by Snart’s appearance in more ways than one. “Oh, uh, yeah, of course.”

 

“Now, what’s going on?”

 

“Um,” replied Barry, watching as  _ Captain Cold _ approached the two guards standing in front of the warehouse doors. “Something’s about to go down... uh… just a sec.”

 

The guards raised their guns and Barry took a breath, ready to race forward. Snart was quick to shoot both of them with his cold gun. 

 

“What are you doing?” Barry whispered in frustration, still rocking forward on the balls of his feet with held-back momentum. 

 

He had to take a moment to close his eyes and breathe. Snart’s presence was completely unexpected and he needed to figure out what he was going to do. They had something of an agreement not to get in each other’s way as long as Snart kept Barry’s identity a secret and didn’t kill innocent people. But, why was Snart even there? Drug lords in the skeevy part of town really wasn’t his scene.

 

“Barry?” questioned Cisco. “Everything okay?”

 

“Yeah, uh,” responded Barry. “S-someone just went inside the warehouse. I need to check it out.”

 

“Okay, be careful, man.”

 

Barry grit his teeth recalling Cisco’s same words of warning from earlier that week and suddenly feeling irritated with his presence in his ear --irritated enough to momentarily consider turning off the bluetooth in his suit. But he wasn’t that stupid, he knew better than to cut himself off from his only help in the case something went really bad. Still, he wondered how he could keep Cisco in the dark as to the fact that Snart was there. He didn’t need to be worried about Cisco thinking he was  _ fixating  _ on the guy when all he really wanted to do was keep a repeat of the three deaths earlier that week from happening.

 

The worst part was that he hadn’t been ‘ _ fixated _ ’ on Snart --at least, not really-- until  _ after _ Cisco and Caitlin had pointed it out. It was only after they had accused him of having a crush that he started to think about it, and once he started thinking about it, well, it had been hard to get Snart out of the forefront of his mind. So much so that seeing Snart appear on the scene so unexpectedly had him feeling guilty of conjuring him simply through fixation. It made no sense that he was there, otherwise.

 

He needed to figure out what was going on. Barry sprinted in a blur to the back of the warehouse. He phased inside with the hope that he could do so unnoticed. He didn’t know what waited on the other side of the aluminum wall. Luckily, his arrival was hidden from view behind a large pile of crates. He crept forward and watched from behind them as the scene unfolded.

 

In the centre of the warehouse stood Leonard Snart, gun raised and ready. There were five more guys with guns like the two who had been out front. They were standing at the ready, guns drawn, all eyes on Snart. Almost directly in front of Barry sitting tied to a chair and looking bloody and bruised was Snart’s partner, Heat Wave.  _ Shit. _ Beside him stood a particularly ugly man who seemed like the leader of the crew with a hand gun pointed at Mick’s head.  _ That _ would definitely explain Snart’s appearance. If Snart was anything, it was loyal to his people. But how had  _ Mick Rory _ gotten himself in trouble with some scuzzy drug lord, gangbanger type?

 

“So, does he owe you money?” called out Snart, his voice carrying across the warehouse. “You know you shouldn’t play, Mick. You always lose.”

 

“It was a hustle, boss,” shouted Mick in response, his voice raspy. “I promise! They slipped something in my drink. I wasn’t myself.”

 

“Tsk, tsk, tsk,” chided Snart. “You druglords are all the same, so very muddy on the issue of consent.” 

 

“I tried telling them we don’t even have any money and we sure as hell want no part in whatever they’re up to,” Mick was saying, but his voice was turning more croak than shout. He looked truly terrible with his one eye swollen shut and  blood staining a line from his nose and mouth down the front of his shirt. 

 

“I don’t like this attitude,” the leader finally spoke, his voice filled with warning and his gun still trained on Mick. “I’m the one with your friend tied up and you two are making small talk?”

 

Snart was walking slowly forward with wide steps, body language sure but collected. Everything about him was calm and cool, except for his eyes, they were narrowed and filled with fire. Barry needed to do something before everything exploded in a full shootout. He glanced around the warehouse, calculating. Everyone was at high alert, everything was tense, but if he timed it right, he could likely disarm all six brutes before anyone could fire a weapon. 

 

It was then that Snart caught his eye and he nearly squeaked in surprise. How long had Snart known he was there? Barry frowned in confusion when Snart lifted his eyebrows at him. What was he trying to communicate to him? Was he asking for help? 

 

The leader was waving his gun as he spoke. He definitely seemed unhinged. Barry glanced back and forth between him and Snart. He could go now and disarm everyone, but what would Snart do?

 

“Your friend here wanted to sample our product without paying,” he went on to explain, sounding much too cocky to be aware of  _ who  _ he was threatening. “And then tried to smooth it over with a game of cards. Well, tough break, he lost and now all I want is some satisfaction.”

 

“Lies, boss,” called Mick. “This  _ Rodriguez _ tool is just being a  _ dick _ .”

  
  
The leader whose name Mick had smartly just indicated to Snart, suddenly pressed the barrel of the gun hard against Mick’s temple. Barry rocked back. He had been ready to run, but now... He was unsure if he could beat a bullet at point blank and was unwilling to test it with Mick’s life on the line.

 

“You’ve already wasted enough of my time,” Rodriguez growled at Mick. “I have big plans for Central City and I’d like to get back to it.”

 

“Now, now,” said Snart. Shooting a look at Barry, he raised his free hand in surrender and lowered his cold gun. “I think it’s time we all  _ cooled _ down. You wouldn’t want to do anything too rash and  _ run _ into trouble.”

 

Rodriguez looked away from Mick, turning his attention and gun back at Snart. That was all Barry needed. He leapt into action. 

 

“I’ll just take some hard payme--” 

 

Barry flashed to him first, yanking the gun from his hand and throwing it across the room before pushing him over. He flashed to the next gunman to do the same and the next and so on. When he skidded to a stop, everyone had been disarmed except Snart. 

 

“Cisco,” Barry panted, “time to send the cavalry.” 

 

Snart rushed forward to Mick. Something twisted in Barry’s chest at the obvious relief on Snart’s usually controlled face now that the gun was no longer pointed at his partner’s head. But with no time to lose, Barry turned away from them and rushed across the warehouse looking for rope. He found some at the back with the piles of crates. He hurried to actually bind the hands of each of the confused and groaning thugs before they gathered their wits. By the time Barry was done, Snart had just finished untying Mick and was helping him to stand.

 

“Making the call, Barry,” spoke Cisco in his ear.

  
  
“Six men incapacitated, two dead,” said Barry, purposely not mentioning Mick and Leonard who were shuffling their way across the warehouse in front of him. 

 

Mick was leaning heavily against Snart as they walked to the door. Snart had his arm wrapped around him and was gently helping him walk, but his eyes were trained on Barry. Barry swallowed heavily. He wanted to say something to him, but knew that if he did, Cisco would hear and know there was more going on. Just as Barry was about to look away, feeling uncomfortable from the intensity of his gaze, Snart nodded at him. It was a small thing, but it felt monumental in that moment. It was acknowledgment of what had just gone down and of what Barry had just done for Snart. Barry bit his lip and nodded back. As Snart and Mick slipped out the large warehouse door, Barry realized his heart was beating much faster than usual even after the racing around he had just done.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need you folks to know HOW much WORK my amazing beta put into this chapter. Listen, I wouldn't have even had the guts to attempt this little dally into action and crime if I didn't know BrodeurBunny would have my back. No.. seriously.. this chapter went from word diarrhea into a rough draft into another rough draft into another rough draft and into a final rough draft that then was finally worked out into the words I'm posting... and we're talking NOVELS of notes from my beta between each new draft. I wanna pretend like this was just a chapter that I wrote easy breezy, but gosh... let's all just applaud BrodeurBunny for all her help.


	6. Thanks for Last Night

 

Barry was in a good mood when he showed up to work at the CCPD the next day. He trotted into the building with a bright smile and was surprised but happy to see that it seemed the rest of station also shared his good mood. A couple of officers grinned wide and nodded to him as they passed in the front room. They weren’t even guys he knew particularly well being a lab nerd who rarely worked with most of the staff beyond crime scenes. Barry’s brow furrowed in confusion, but he returned their smiles and called a good morning to them anyway.

 

“Good Morning?” laughed Joe West, coming into the room. “Barry, it’s practically noon.”

 

“Hey Joe,” said Barry stepping closer to him to purposely bump shoulders in greeting as they moved to walk up the stairs.  
  
A young woman just coming down the stairs momentarily made eye-contact  as she passed Barry and let out a little titter. Barry nearly missed the next stair craning his neck to look at her after she passed.

 

“What the…” he spoke under his breath.

 

“Speaking of that,” said Joe, his voice taking on his long-suffering father tone which immediately had Barry on edge wondering what he’d done. “Someone sent you flowers earlier this morning. Since you weren’t here, they had me sign for them at the front. They’re up on your desk.”

 

“Oh,” said Barry, eyebrows knitting together, before he shrugged and smiled easily. “Well, that’s nice, I wonder who they could be from.”

 

Joe let out a heavy breath.

 

“It’s not nice?” asked Barry, tilting his head to the side in confusion.

 

Joe opened his mouth to speak, a frown pulling at the sides of his mouth, but--

 

“Barrrryyyy!” called a detective Barry had interacted with only a handful of times in the past. It took him a moment to remember his name; Detective Jenkins.

 

Joe and Barry had just reached the top of the stairs and, at Jenkins’ shout, Joe frowned.

 

“We’ll talk about it later,” he said looking pained. He shook his head before turning to walk away.

 

Barry’s brow furrowed at Joe’s hasty departure, before he had to turn his attention to Jenkins who was walking toward him with a weird grin on his face.

 

“Hi?” replied Barry, even going so far as to raise his hand to wave awkwardly.

 

“How was your night?” asked Jenkins, wiggling his eyebrows.

 

“Uh,” said Barry, mind immediately flashing back to the showdown at the warehouse. “It was alright, I guess. Pretty boring… just, you know, the usual.”

 

“Wow,” laughed Jenkins, throwing an arm around Barry’s shoulders to walk with him. It was then that Barry realized there were multiple other people watching with interest as he and Jenkins passed. “Your usual must be a lot more entertaining than _my_ usual.”

 

Barry frowned at that, heart kicking up a few notches. Unsure of what he had walked into and with no idea what was going on, he let the guy walk him down the hall to his lab.

 

“What am I missing?” asked Barry trying to be a good sport and adding a small laugh. Which _immediately_ caught in his throat the moment they turned the corner and he saw the _immense_ size of the comically extravagant floral arrangement taking up a large portion of his desk.

 

Barry stopped in his tracks and Jenkins burst into laughter beside him. The flowers were arranged in a vase so large that it looked more like something meant to sit on the floor than on a desk or table. Barry knew next to nothing about flowers besides the difference between a rose and a daisy, but it was obvious from the sheer size of the arrangement and the multiple shapes of the blooms within it, that the thing had been costly. There was a card stuck in the flowers on a decorative plastic pick. Shrugging Jenkins’ arm off his shoulders, Barry walked across the room to get a closer look at it.

 

It was a “Thank You” card and in sharp, neat cursive writing was spelled out the truly horrifying words;

_Thanks for last night_

_\--L_

 

Those words were just out there, on display for anyone who came within a handful of feet from the arrangement. Knowing the station, _everyone_ had probably curiously checked out the flowers at some point over the morning. So, that meant _everyone_ had read those words, including Joe who had signed for the flowers.

 

“Oh my gosh,” whispered Barry, grabbing the card off the plastic pick and shoving it into his pocket.

 

Jenkins hadn’t stopped laughing. He laughed all the way out Barry’s door. Barry could hear him still laughing as he walked away down the hall. Barry found he really disliked the guy.

 

He didn’t dare turn around to see if anyone else had been standing in the doorway in hopes of seeing his reaction. He could feel the heat in his face and knew he had turned beet red.

 

Wishing he could just flash out of there and find somewhere peaceful to die of mortification, Barry carefully moved the large arrangement more to the side of his desk. It was heavier than he had expected and wobbled precariously.

 

“Shit,” he hissed between clenched teeth, lurching forward to steady the monstrosity.

 

Once it was finally positioned at a safe distance from his work, Barry took a moment to stare at it still feeling at a loss. Then he took a deep breath as if preparing for something truly horrible and sat down in his chair to get to work.

 

He had tests to run, papers to write, and forms to complete, but it was hard to keep his mind on task with that giant, floral reminder of Leonard Snart sitting on his desk. Barry narrowed his eyes at it. He knew it was just an inanimate object, but still, he couldn’t help but feel like it was laughing at him, like it was taunting him. It sure didn’t help that, as the day progressed, almost every single person who walked past his door would double-take, or laugh, or even wolf whistle.

 

“I hate you,” he found himself muttering at the colourful arrangement of flowers later that day. He needed to go down to the bullpen, but couldn’t bring himself to leave his desk, not when he knew lecherous looks and laughter were awaiting him down there.

 

The flowers weren’t even the problem. Sure, they would have gotten him some attention on their own, especially given their size, but it would have been passing curiosity at worst. No, the problem was the handwritten card that had been sticking proudly, tauntingly out of the arrangement. It was that one line written in cursive writing so full of innuendo. It was obvious that Snart had known exactly what he was doing. Barry wished for the same insight because _he_ definitely had _no idea_ what Snart was doing.

 

Was he embarrassed that the Flash had saved him? Was this his way of trying to get even? Just like the pizza, it seemed like an exorbitant amount of money to spend on a gag. But, just like his response to Barry’s prank call, it was dripping in innuendo and possibility. What did it mean?

 

Barry pulled the crumpled card from his pocket and smoothed it out over the open files on his desk. There was a lot of character to the hand-writing. Was it Snart’s writing? Would Leonard Snart risk walking into a florist shop to order flowers for a prank when he’s a known criminal? No, he probably phoned in or ordered online. Barry touched the handwritten words. What if he _had_ actually gone to the store, picked out the flowers, and written on the card himself? What if he was truly thankful that Barry had stepped in the night before? What if… what if he was sending flowers because he was actually interested in Barry in a romantic way?

 

Barry swallowed heavily. That was an insane train of thought and he needed to stop it immediately. There was no way Snart was interested in him and, even if he was interested, he was a bad guy and Barry was _The Flash_. It couldn’t work even if he wanted it to work.. which he didn’t because… that would be insane.

 

“ _I’m fixating_ ,” Barry breathed, his eyes widening as the full realization hit him.

 

He had a crush on Leonard Snart!

 

Barry leaped out of his chair, nearly toppling it over in his speed. He paced the lab, anxiously rubbing his hands through his hair. He couldn’t believe he’d let this happen. How could he have gotten a crush on one of the outlaws he regularly fought? Well, it had been a while since he’d actually had to fight, Snart. On the other hand, it wasn’t as if the guy was retired. He had just pulled a heist just over a week ago.

 

Which, Barry had _kind of_ known about and had _sort of_ ignored --but only because there had been bigger fish to fry at the time! Len and he had an understanding, afterall. Whereas he didn’t have any sort of truce with the other criminals in town. It only made sense to go after the murderers and leave the thief alone. There was only one Flash and there were plenty of criminals, sometimes it was necessary to prioritize.

 

Barry paused in his pacing. He was suddenly hit with the question as to whether the whole truce was now moot. Considering Snart had killed two men the night before and Barry had let him go, perhaps Snart was under the impression the agreement was suddenly open to interpretation. Barry ran a hand over his face and groaned. He walked over to the window and leaned on the sill. Those two men weren’t innocent. And it all had been under extenuating circumstances considering the group had kidnapped Mick. He couldn’t expect Len to be thinking about some tentative truce with the local superhero when his best friend was on the line. Hell, if two guys holding big guns were between Barry and a beat and tied up Cisco, Barry might have a hard time treading lightly, too.

 

Barry looked down at the card in his hand.  

_Thanks for last night_

_\--L_

 

He closed his eyes and let out a heavy breath before shoving the card back in his pocket. He really needed to stop fixating and get back to work. Maybe he just needed to clear his head first.  He checked the time. It was nearly time for his coffee break, maybe he’d run down to Jitters. Then, when he came back, he’d face the bullpen and get the files he needed so he could get back to work.

  


\-----

  


Leonard leaned his head against the headrest of his driver’s seat after getting back in his car. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before letting it out in a slow, long exhale. He needed a moment to centre himself before he started driving. The past seventeen hours had been hell and the resulting exhaustion and nerves were catching up with him.

 

After getting Mick out of the shitstorm down at the loading docks, Leonard had driven him to one of his safe houses across town. He had called Lisa on the way and told her to meet them there. She had been seething mad when she found out what had happened, especially over the fact that Leonard had gone in alone. The safe house was fully stocked with first aid supplies, and Mick had given him his whole side of the story through clenched teeth while Leonard had checked his hurt leg and his ribs to see if anything was broken.

 

Lisa had helped clean Mick up while Leonard went into the other room to make a few calls. He had needed to make sure there were no loose ends, no chances of retaliation should the guys from that night have connections. He knew he couldn’t let something like that happen again; he couldn’t afford to get sloppy or distracted anymore.    
  
With the mess that had occured the night before, he had considered cancelling his appointment at the bank that morning. In the end, he had gone. He had left Lisa in charge of Mick and had driven in the early hours before dawn back across town to his civilian house to tiredly shower, shave, and get dressed. And then he had gone to his appointment at the bank to get okayed for the mortgage on the new house he had chosen. It wasn’t the house with ‘great light’. It was a different house with less windows and more bedrooms; one he could more easily fortify.

 

It was both tedious and nerve-wracking to be running errands in person in broad daylight. Even on a good day with a full night’s worth of sleep, it would have put him on edge. Being over-tired and strung-out from the events of the night before meant Leonard had been even more uneasy as he went to his appointment at the bank. Then he had had to wait around downtown to meet with his lawyer to sign paperwork for the house purchase.

 

So, it had been a welcome distraction, seeing the flower shop across the street as he had come out of the bank and getting the idea to send flowers to Barry at work. Leonard had chosen the most extravagant option for a single floral arrangement that the place offered knowing it would gain much more attention from Barry’s coworkers than a simple bouquet. When he had seen the cards to choose from at the till, it had filled him with a bubbling sense of glee imagining the look on Barry’s face. He had grinned widely as he scrawled the words across the card and handed it to the lady at the counter to affix to the finished arrangement. She had blushed after glancing at it which had only made Leonard’s delight grow.

 

Now, he was back in his car after signing his fake name on what seemed like a thousand legal documents at the lawyer’s office. The keys to his new house were in his pocket and he was feeling the exhaustion from being awake for so long beginning to cloud his mind. He wanted to go home and sleep, but he couldn’t. He needed to change and then go back to check on Mick and Lisa. It had been an oversight to leave Mick to his own devices before and now he was living with the consequences. He wouldn’t make that mistake again.

 

With a sigh, Leonard started the car and put it into gear. Maybe he could catch a quick cat nap at the safe house. He pulled out into the busy afternoon traffic. The streets were packed and his patience was thin. He grit his teeth together as he frustratingly hit a sequence of red lights all in a row. His eyes were beginning to sting from fatigue. Finally, the light he was currently stopped at turned green and he started to go.

 

Suddenly, Barry was sitting in the passenger seat beside him. Leonard startled hard. Jolting and cranking the steering wheel. Fast as ever, Barry grabbed the wheel to keep Leonard from turning them into oncoming traffic.

 

“Hey,” said Barry casually like he hadn’t just appeared in Leonard’s car and scared him quite literally nearly to death. “I saw you driving by. Oh, hey, nice blazer.”

 

“H-how’d you do that?” asked Leonard, hating how his voice came out strained and stuttered. He wasn’t used to having big reactions outside his control. “My doors are locked.”

 

Barry was chuckling at him and Leonard would have been mad except that he’d never actually seen Barry smile and laugh in such a carefree manner before. Normally, the kid was always wearing an angry mask of ‘ _superhero angst_ ’ along with his actual Flash mask  when they interacted --well, except for the week before when he was drunk and trying to prank him. Instead, he was sitting in Leonard’s car dressed in his regular clothes and wearing an adorable, dorky smile.

 

“Oh,” said Barry, waving his hand. “I phased in.”

 

“You what…” asked Leonard, still too surprised by Barry’s sudden appearance to keep from scrunching his face in confusion.

 

“Phased,” said Barry with a shrug, his enthusiastic smile altogether too distracting. “It’s a thing I can do. Okay, see, it’s a pretty cool byproduct of my speed. I can vibrate my molecules at an atomic level and it allows me to move through solid objects. It was actually a lot harder to figure out than it looks, but after some training with--” Barry stopped his nerdy, little tirade and gave an awkward laugh.

 

“Actually,” he said, rubbing a hand over the back of his head in what looked like a nervous habit. “This is probably stuff I shouldn’t be telling _you_.”

 

“Probably,” deadpanned Leonard, tucking that information aside for later. Barry would be the perfect thief if his morals weren’t always in the way.

 

His heart rate was finally slowing down to something normal. His surprise at Barry’s sudden appearance having mostly worn off, Leonard reached for his familiar, calm, cold facade. He narrowed his eyes and stared ahead at the road.

 

“What are you doing here, Barry,” he asked.

 

Barry let out a sigh next to him.

 

“Listen,” said Barry. “I got your flowers which… if the plan was to make everyone in the station gossip about me… _mission accomplished_ . So, thanks for that.”   
  
Leonard let the corner of his mouth tick up. Damn, he would have loved to have seen that.

 

“I just wanted you to know that the conditions of our agreement still stand,” continued Barry. “Just because I let you go last night doesn’t mean I’m okay with you _killing_ people.”

 

“They were two-bit, wannabe gangsters trying to push street drugs,” retorted Snart, twisting his mouth in disgust.

 

“Still people,” argued Barry. “I’m just saying, I didn’t let you go because I suddenly condone you killing people. The agreement still stands; no killing.”

 

“Then why _did_ you let us go?” asked Snart, glancing over at Barry to raise an eyebrow at him.

 

The light ahead of them turned red and it was the first red light Leonard had been happy for that day. It gave him a moment to really look at Barry. It was perfect timing, too, because Barry was back to nervously rubbing the back of his head and a blush that was beginning to pink across his face and down his neck. His embarrassment was so adorable that it almost hurt to look at him.

 

“You weren’t the reason I was there last night,” spoke Barry, his words picking up speed as he spoke. “I was there because of those drug dealers. They’d been making trouble before and I had no idea you were going to be there, too. It seemed pretty obvious you guys weren’t in cahoots with them and I didn’t want Cisco to say that I’m fixated on you, again, so I thought it’d be better to just leave you two alone. How _is_ Mick, anyway?”

 

“He’ll live,” replied Leonard, before bodily turning in his seat to better face Barry. He narrowed his eyes and leaned just a touch into Barry’s space.

 

“ _Are_ you _fixated_ on me, Barry?”

 

“Augh,” groaned Barry, dropping his head in his hands. “I said that, didn’t I?”

 

“You did,” said Leonard, pursing his lips so he wouldn’t give himself away by doing something stupid like smiling.

 

“Right, well, I think I’ve said enough,” sputtered Barry, voice going high and squeaky. He was glaring as his next words tumbled out altogether too fast. “The point is, I’m not going to just stay out of your way if you’re getting involved with drug dealers and mob bosses and going around killing innocent people… or I guess, not-so-innocent people. You need to keep up your side of the agreement if you want me to keep up mine.”

 

And with that Barry disappeared. Leonard glanced in his rear-view mirror in time to see the remnants of a red streak moving away behind him.

  
“Well,” he said to himself. “That was _enlightening_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BrodeurBunny continues to be the hero of this story.


	7. Some Angst Happens...

Barry didn’t have the opportunity to spend any time wallowing over the embarrassing scene he’d just had with Len. When he got back to his lab at the station, Joe was already there waiting for him.

 

“Hey Barry,” said Joe with a smile. “Where’d you get back from?”

 

“Heeey,” said Barry, trying to sound normal but likely missing the mark. “I was just at Jitters for a coffee.” 

 

Joe looked suspiciously at Barry’s empty hands and raised an eyebrow.

 

“Oh, haha,” said Barry laughing awkwardly. “Yeah. I, uh… already finished it.”

 

Really, he had completely forgotten to even grab a coffee at Jitters, after seeing Len drive by. Approaching Len directly after realizing his crush had likely been a mistake. Especially since it had led to him _literally_ _admitting_ to being accused of fixating on him. He might as well have proposed!

 

“You know, Barry,” said Joe with a smile and a shake of his head, pulling Barry from his thoughts. “I know you’re used to doing everything fast, but I can’t imagine chugging a hot coffee would be particularly pleasant. You need to slow down sometimes. You know, enjoy the moment.”

 

“Right,” said Barry nodding, but he couldn’t help but feel a touch suspicious as he recognized the duplicity of Joe’s smile. He needed to stop internally spiraling and pay closer attention to Joe. 

 

“Anyway, here’s some files from downstairs that I think you’re probably needing for that case you were working on,” said Joe, giving the files in his hand a little shake before setting them on Barry’s desk. 

 

“Oh, Joe,” said Barry, dropping his shoulders and grinning in relief. “I could kiss you! I was  _ not _ looking forward to going in there today.”

 

Joe chuckled.

 

“I’ll pass,” he joked before turning his attention on the flowers, obviously knowing they were the reason for Barry’s reluctance to enter the bullpen. “About those flowers…”

 

“They’re just a prank from an asshole,” offered Barry with a playful roll of his eyes, but his hackles were immediately up. He had been right to feel suspicious, Joe was leading into something for certain. 

 

“Pretty expensive prank,” said Joe with a whistle.

 

“A wealthy asshole,” amended Barry. “ _ Come on _ , Joe, you know what I was up to last night. Despite what the rumour mill seems to have taken from the flowers, I wasn’t in anyone’s  _ bed _ .”

 

“Last night is actually why I’m here,” said Joe which was both a relief and a cause for distress. Finally, Joe was getting to the point. “The two guys who were killed appear to have been frozen to death. Now, we both know someone who has a gun that could do something like that. What I don’t understand is why Captain Cold would be running with a bunch of drug dealer types. I was hoping you could shed some light on that.”

 

Barry had started fidgeting during Joe’s short spiel. He let out a sigh and leaned back against his desk with his arms crossed. He had known he couldn’t actually keep Len’s involvement a secret, but that didn’t make it any easier to face Joe. He realized his arm crossing was a defensive move and quickly dropped them.

 

“The group was holding Mick Rory hostage,” revealed Barry in defeat.

 

“Mick Rory,” repeated Joe, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

 

Barry nodded before looking away.

 

“Snart got there shortly after I did,” he continued, jiggering his leg anxiously. “It looked like they were expecting him. I think they probably had Mick call him for some sort of ransom. Snart showed up, iced the guards when they wanted him to surrender his gun, and then went in to get Mick.”

 

“So,” said Joe, his voice sounding somewhere between concern and accusation.  "You mean to say you had Leonard Snart and Mick Rory in your grasp and you  _ let them go _ ?"

 

"I didn't  _ let _ them go,” returned Barry. “But, they weren't my priority. I was there to bust the drug dealer. They had nothing to do with it. They were the innocents in this case."

 

"Except that the only two deaths there last night were because of Snart."

 

"Yeah but that was more self defense,” argued Barry, finally turning to look Joe in the face. 

 

“Joe, he wasn't the  _ bad _ guy last night, Joe,” pleaded Barry when he saw the closed-off look on Joe’s face. “He--He was the one needing help… my help...  _ The Flash’s _ help."

 

Without meaning to, Barry glanced over at the flowers. He bit his lip when he realized Joe had caught the look and made the connection.

 

"Besides, what kind of idiot hold's  _ Captain Cold _ 's partner hostage?” continued Barry feeling defiant. “They're lucky he played it as cool as he did."

 

Joe's face was pulled into a deep frown, his nostrils were flared. Barry’s heart rate ratcheted up at that. Those were signs of a very upset Joe West. Barry crossed his arms, again.

 

"I don't like the sound of my son making excuses for Leonard Snart," spoke Joe in a low, dangerous voice. "What's really going on here?  _ Who _ are the flowers from, Barry?"

 

"I think you already know, Joe," said Barry with a frustrated sigh. He dropped his crossed arms and walked around his desk to sit down. He loved Joe, but he was the  _ last  _ person he wanted to talk to about Leonard Snart so soon after realizing the messy crush he’d developed. 

 

"Thanks for the files," he said dismissively. "I better get to work."

 

"We're not done talking about this," said Joe in warning before leaving the lab in an angry huff.

 

"Oh, I don't doubt it," answered Barry to himself leaning his head into the palm of his hand.

  
  


\-----------------------

 

Leonard returned to the small, worn house in the older neighbourhood near the tracks that was one of his safehouses. When he walked in, he found Mick dozing on the old couch in the living room with the tv on. Lisa was sitting in the old armchair next to him playing on her phone. She looked up when Leonard entered the room.

 

“Bring any food?” she asked.

 

“I did not,” replied Leonard, glancing past her at Mick. “How’s he?”

 

“A whiny baby, but that’s not new,” said Lisa with an eyeroll.

 

“Hey,” growled Mick from the couch, not opening his eyes.

 

“I got possession of the house,” said Leonard, dropping his cold gun on the wooden crate acting as coffee table and walking past them to the kitchen around the corner. 

 

“Mazel tov,” rasped Mick.

 

Lisa got up and followed Leonard into the kitchen. Leonard kept his back to her. He looked in the fridge for a drink,  but more so as something to do. He didn’t feel like talking. He was exhausted and he knew she’d have more to say about the events of the night before.

 

“We need to have a housewarming party,” she said.

 

Leonard pulled a beer out of the fridge and let the door fall closed. He turned slowly around and levelled her with an unimpressed frown.

 

“The whole point of my moving is to keep people from knowing where I live and you want to throw a housewarming party?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

 

Lisa’s eyes narrowed.

 

“What do you mean the _ whole point of moving is to keep people from knowing where you live _ ?” she asked, tilting her head to the side and taking a step into Leonard’s space. “I thought you said nobody had found you.”

 

Leonard’s heart skipped a beat. He swallowed.

 

“I  _ said  _ ‘everything was fine’,” said Leonard. 

 

“So, who knows where you live, Lenny?” asked Lisa, pressing further into his space. 

 

Leonard curled his lip not liking his own sister challenging him. He lifted his chin, not willing to back down even though his pulse was racing. A smile spread across her face and she turned away to pace the room, acting thoughtful and twirling her hair around her finger.

 

“Hmm,” she said looking up at the ceiling. “Who of your enemies could have found out where you lived and not have been an immediate threat? Hmmm. You know, the only person who comes to mind is the Flash. Does  _ the Flash _ know where you live, Lenny?” 

 

Mick limped into the kitchen, hand against the wall for support. Leonard ground his teeth together. So, they were ganging up on him now.

 

“That why he saved us last night?” asked Mick, voice low. “Cuz you two are knocking boots?”

 

“I don’t blame you for wanting to  _ get with that _ , brother,” drawled Lisa. “He’s a hot thing and you’ve been half-way obsessed with him since the first time he sparked his way into your life. But... you’re being stupid.”

 

Leonard’s breath caught in his throat. He was taken aback that they thought he was having sex with Barry on the side. Considering Lisa’s ‘static’ comment back at the home-showing, he wondered how long she had been suspecting that.  

 

Leonard tilted his head back and closed his eyes. He let out an audible breath of irritation. For about half a second, he considered coming clean to them about everything. Then he realized that the idea of him and the Flash being enemies with  _ benefits _ was likely more believable and less embarrassing than the fact that they’d been playing a strange game of juvenile pranks. 

 

“Whether or not I’m…  _ knocking boots  _ with the Flash,” started Leonard, pausing for emphasis on Mick’s ridiculous choice of euphemism. “The fact remains that  _ Mick _ was the one who put us in a bad position this week.”

 

“Right,” said Lisa, putting her hands on his hips. “And  _ you _ were too much of a  _ big shot _ to ask for help getting him back. Or did you immediately call up your red buddy, instead of  _ your own sister _ , and beg  _ him _ to come help you?” 

 

“I don’t have to stand here and listen to this  _ bullshit _ ,” growled Leonard. 

 

He glared at both of them for a moment. Then, he cocked his head to the side and spat out, “I’m leaving.”

 

“You just got here,” argued Mick and it almost sounded apologetic, if Leonard squinted.

 

“And now it’s time to go,” he said with a shrug, walking back into the living room to grab his cold gun. 

 

“Lenny,” called Lisa, following after him.

 

“What?” exploded Leonard, swinging around to glare at her.

 

She winced and Leonard immediately felt terrible.

 

“You’re being emotional,” she said quietly.

 

Those three words slapped him in face. He froze and stared at her for a moment before looking past her at Mick who was slowly shuffling after them on his bad leg. Mick tightened his lips and raised his eyebrows, indicating that he agreed with Lisa.

 

“I’ll see you in the morning,” said Leonard before whirling away.

 

“But we’re hungry,” called Lisa to his back.

 

“Then order a damned pizza,” growled Leonard before slamming the front door shut behind him.

 

\---------------------

 

It was late in the evening and Barry had been too irritated to go home. He’d considered going down to the station’s gym to work out some of his frustration on the punching bag, but didn’t want to risk having to see anyone. It had been a long day of ribbing and, with the confrontation with Joe earlier, he was  _ done _ with people. He raced over to STAR labs and was both relieved and disappointed to find Cisco had already gone home for the night.

 

It would have been nice to do some hero runs with him. However, knowing Cisco, he’d likely have asked what was bothering him and, knowing  _ Barry _ , he would have likely come clean about everything in a massive fit of frustrated oversharing. That would only make things worse. Barry  _ really _ didn’t need anymore people weighing in on his not-actually-a-relationship with Leonard Snart just then. 

 

So, instead, Barry put on the suit and decided to just do his own patrol run around the city without use of Cisco’s scanners. He ran without direction, but his frustrations must have taken control of his feet at some point because he soon found himself standing across the street from Leonard Snart’s house. 

 

He stood a while debating with himself about what to do next. Should he go ring the doorbell and talk to Len? Would Len even be home? What would Barry even say to him? Finally, with an exhale that sounded a little bit like ‘ _ fuck it _ ’ to his own ears, Barry zipped up to the front door and pressed the doorbell. 

 

It felt like forever waiting for the door to open and Barry was already regretting his bold decision. He glanced over his shoulder hoping there was no one around to notice the Flash standing on some random person’s doorstep. Finally, he heard the sound of the door locks sliding open. Barry took a deep breath.

 

The door swung open to reveal Len standing on the other side wearing nothing but a towel tied around his waist. He must have just stepped out of the shower. There was so much dewy, damp skin on display. The sight nearly knocked the wind from Barry’s lungs. 

 

Barry choked out a garbled version of hello.

 

“I don’t particularly enjoy having my enemies show up at my private residence unannounced,  _ Flash _ ,” spoke Len. 

 

Barry swallowed heavily and forcibly pulled his eyes from the lean muscles of Len’s chest and defined arms back up to his face. The familiarity of the subtle smirk and raised eyebrow waiting for him on Len’s smug face were enough to help Barry find his voice again.

 

“ _ So _ , like last year when  _ you _ showed up at Joe’s house and we came home to find you sitting in the living room in the dark,” sassed Barry cocking his head to the side. “Or a few months ago when I found you  _ laying on my bed _ in my apartment; that’s not something you’d  _ particularly enjoy _ ? At least  _ I  _ rang your doorbell like a  _ normal person _ .”

 

“Hmm.. touché,” quipped Len. 

 

He gave Barry a thoughtful look before turning away. 

 

“Just a moment,” he said. 

 

Curious, Barry craned his neck to watch as Len retreated back into his house a step and pressed a few buttons on what must have been his security system controls. 

 

“Okay,” he said a moment later and opened the door wider in invitation. “Had to disarm _the_ _Flash_ _detector_ ,” Len explained with a wink.

 

He wasn’t sure if it was the wink or the fact that he was being invited into Leonard Snart’s private home, but Barry’s heart was suddenly pounding. Mentally asking what he was getting himself into, Barry gingerly stepped inside. Len shut the door behind him and slid all the locks back into place. Barry glanced around. The house was almost completely bare and there were boxes piled against the wall nearest the front door.

 

“Moving?” asked Barry.

 

“It seems one of my enemies learned where I live,” replied Len with narrowed eyes that would have been a glare had the corners of his mouth not been ticked up with amusement.

 

“Cisco will be relieved,” quipped Barry, reaching to take off his cowl but pausing with sudden worry. He glanced down the hall.

 

“Don’t worry,  _ Barry _ . We’re alone,” assured Len before sauntering into the nearly empty living room and sitting down on a small couch. He was  _ still _ in nothing but his towel and Barry  _ still _ didn’t know what to do with that. It was very distracting.

 

“I’m the best kind of neighbour,” continued Len. “Quiet, keep to myself, hardly ever home. Cisco should be so lucky.”

 

“Right,” said Barry, worrying the material of the base of his cowl between gloved fingers before finally pulling it off over his face. “I’m surprised you even have a regular place. Don’t you need to keep on the move?”

 

Even if Barry had caught Len just getting out of the shower, it was definitely a power move on Len’s part to choose to remain in just the towel. He should have looked vulnerable, especially given how much leaner he was than Barry would have guessed.  _ Not _ that Barry had spent much time thinking about Len’s physique (he really hadn’t…  _ before _ ), but the layers and parka had always given Len a big presence. Still, the thin, athletic build, the bare feet, the towel; none of these things made Len look small. 

 

“Why are you here, Barry?” asked Len, the tone telling Barry he was losing patience with the small talk. 

 

Barry took the few steps from the front door into the open living room. The small couch --more a loveseat, really-- was the only piece of furniture left in there and Len was practically sprawled across the entire thing. Another power move. Barry swallowed dryly and remained standing stiffly in the centre of the room feeling young and awkward in comparison.

 

“I wanted…” started Barry, but he paused and took a deep breath. “I wanted to know what’s going on. I mean… between us.”

 

Len was pursing his lips and Barry immediately panicked.

 

“I mean with the pranks!” he quickly added, his voice squeaking.

 

“Ahh,” said Len, his smirk back in place. “Well, why don’t you tell me, Barry. You started it.”

 

Barry groaned and rubbed a hand over his face.

 

“Can you turn off the Captain Cold act for like two minutes?” whined Barry. “I’m trying to be serious, here. If I’m going to be fighting with Joe because of you, and ribbed all day by my coworkers because of your flowers, I’d like to at least know where we stand.”

 

“Serious?” asked Len, straightening from his lounge position. Emotion bled into his face as he continued, his words coming out in all sharp consonants and frustrated tones.  “You want to get serious, Barry? Fine. I’m tired and I’m angry. My partner was roofied, cheated, and kidnapped by a  _ nobody _ drug lord not twenty-four hours ago. My sister is busy taking care of his beat-up ass so that I can finish moving house  _ on my own _ . And the both of them are on my back wondering why I suddenly have the Flash in my corner during a shoot-out. I don’t know what’s going on between us, so I’ll say it again… why. don’t. you. tell. me.  _ Barry _ .”

 

Barry was stunned. Several beats passed where he and Len stared at each other in silence. Finally, Barry realized his mouth was hanging open and snapped it closed. He swallowed thickly and looked down at the floor.

 

“Do uh…” he started, rubbing at the back of his head. “Do you want help moving?”

 

“What?”

 

“I’m kind of really fast and strong,” said Barry, shrugging and blushing and still staring at the floor. “I could just run the rest of your stuff over to your new place.”

 

Barry looked up when Len didn’t answer right away. Len was leaning forward where he was still sitting on the couch, elbows braced on his knees, hands folded and index fingers pressed against his brow. Barry fidgetted. 

 

“Wouldn’t that kind of defeat the purpose of my moving?” asked Len, looking up at Barry from behind his hands.

 

“Cisco and Caitlin still wouldn’t know,” offered Barry, lamely. 

 

Len let out a laugh that sounded a little broken to Barry’s ears. The bare chest and towel around his waist hadn’t made him look vulnerable, but that lost look on his face right there definitely did. Barry’s chest felt tight with it. 

 

He took a step back as Len got to his feet and brushed past him. Barry bit his lips together and turned to watch him go. He went into the kitchen and stood with his back to him, hands braced on the counter. Obviously wanting to put more space between them.

 

“Sorry, that was dumb,” offered Barry, feeling wrong-footed in the sudden change in their dynamic. He was used to easy good-guy, bad-guy banter. This sudden honesty, though he had asked for it, was disorienting. “I just w--”   
  
“It’s late,” cut in Len, though he sounded nothing like his usual cold persona. He sounded… tired. “You should go home.”

 

The line of his back and the exhaustion in his voice pulled at Barry’s heart. He was hit with the sudden irrational urge to hug him. It was the strangest sensation. Beyond a few pranks and the whole thing the night before, they weren’t friends, they weren’t even allies. 

 

“Okay,” he sighed. “But, Len--”

 

“ _ Go home, Barry _ ,” hissed Len, voice firm and a touch colder.

 

Barry dropped his shoulders in defeat and nodded to himself. He put his mask back on and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always... thank you to BrodeurBunny for really making me WORK for this chapter. 
> 
> I hope you folks enjoyed this fall from shenanigans to aaaangst... HAH! Bet you didn't see that coming! NYAR!


	8. Larold Snark

Tired as he was, Leonard had a hard time falling asleep that night. Restless, he layed in bed staring up at the dark ceiling feeling more alone than he’d felt in a long time. The earnest expression on Barry’s face was keeping him awake. It wouldn’t leave his mind and it panged in his chest every time he thought of it.

 

Leonard had grown up knowing he could never show weakness around anyone. Showing weakness of any kind gave others opportunity to use it against him. That had been a pillar of his understanding as he had carved out his place in life; even allies needed to be held at arm's length. And then came Barry, ever the hero, with his adorable face and this perplexing eagerness to lay his cards on the table.

 

Barry’s first reaction upon seeing any hint of weakness from his enemy was to immediately offer help. It probably hadn’t even occurred to him that the chinks he was seeing in Leonard’s armor earlier that night were something he could exploit. And then he had slipped and called him ‘Len’ instead of ‘Snart’ or ‘Cold’. There was a sweetness and genuineness to Barry that Leonard had never been privy to. That friendly intimacy so freely on offer filled Leonard with longing. It was something he had never expected to want. It made him feel lonely.

 

It was too much; it was all too much. Leonard sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He stared unseeingly out the dark window while rubbing his hand over his face. He shouldn’t have let his walls down even a bit. He and Barry were on opposite sides and he was setting himself up for failure. He had been distracted and sloppy because of this dalliance into personal territory with Barry Allen.

 

Leonard got out of bed and paced the room. He needed to stop this. He needed to put some distance back between them. Things had already gotten too muddied and he needed to reestablish their roles for his own sanity. He would have to find a quick job, something routine that he could do in his sleep. He needed to get things back to normal. A quick job would get his mind back on task and show Barry where he stood. No more of this temptation to go straight for some _altruistic kid_.

 

\---------------

 

Barry groggily skidded into STAR Labs the next morning. He had nearly overslept after staying up most the night having an internal crisis over his feelings toward Len.  He knew he was still a mess of opposing feelings, but all he wanted to do was shove those aside and start his day. He hoped a few hero runs before work would be just the thing.

 

“Good morning,” he called as he entered the room.

 

Cisco looked up from the computer with a grim look on his face.

 

“Hey Barry,” he said, voice dull.

 

“What’s going on?” asked Barry, brow furrowing.

 

“Nothing,” said Cisco, shaking his head and forcing a fake half-smile on his face. “You ready for some morning _heroing_?”

 

“Yeah, I guess,” said Barry bouncing on his toes. “What do you have for me?”

 

Cisco clicked around on the computer before telling him a place and a crime. Then Barry was racing off to put on his suit and speed to the scene. When Barry returned, Cisco had another situation for him to head to, and another.

 

This was one of Barry’s favourite times of day because of the easy teamwork between Cisco and himself. They both loved solving problems and diffusing emergencies; Barry running into action and Cisco the voice of direction in his ear. But, Cisco’s bad mood didn’t improve as the morning progressed.

 

“Are you ready to tell me what’s wrong?” asked Barry once he had returned a final time.

 

Cisco frowned at him, before turning away to busy himself. He was avoiding something.

 

“I know something’s up,” pressed Barry. “Are you mad at me?”

 

“Why’d you leave me in the dark about Rory and Snart being at the drug bust the other night?” Cisco finally asked.

 

Barry froze, panic and guilt kicking him in the chest.

 

“We’re supposed to be a team,” said Cisco, glaring down at his hands. “You’re the speed and the brawn; and I’m the brains. Well, you’re also the brains, but still, we’re a team. Or at least that’s what I thought.”

 

“We are, Cisco,” said Barry. “I’m sorry… I just… I saw him and I panicked. I didn’t want to be accused of fixating or crushing on him, again. I’m sorry.”

 

Barry could actually see the fight drain out of Cisco’s frame at his apology. He was relieved and a little surprised that Cisco had let him off the hook so easily.

 

“It’s more than a crush, though, isn’t it?” asked Cisco with a sad smile, catching Barry off guard.

 

“What?”

 

“You guys have been ‘ _getting it on_ ’ in secret, right?” asked Cisco gloomily, moving his head from side to side as he sang ‘getting it on’ in a poor attempt at humour.

 

“What? No, Cisco. _No_ ,” said Barry shaking his head frantically.

 

“Why are you still lying, Barry,” sighed Cisco looking hurt. “Your suit has tracking on it, _genius_. I know you were at his house late last night.”

 

Barry opened his mouth to speak, but Cisco raised his hand to silence him.

 

“And before you say anything,” he continued. “I wasn’t _spying_ on you. This morning I saw on the computer that you had gone out with the suit last night, so I was just checking it over and it showed me you only went to one place.”

 

“Then you know I wasn’t there long enough to ‘ _get it on_ ’ with anyone,” argued Barry, his face feeling hot with embarrassment while he internally berated himself for being so stupid.

 

“I don’t know that,” cried Cisco, flapping his hands. “You’re _the Flash_ , you do _everything_ fast!”

 

Barry’s mouth fell open in shock. _What the hell, Cisco!?_ He slammed it shut and glared down at Cisco completely at a loss of what to say. Caitlin cleared her throat nervously from the doorway. Both Barry and Cisco swung around to face her.

 

“I’m sorry,” said Caitlin. “Barry you had asked me to start reminding you when you have to leave for work so you’d stop being late.”

 

“Right,” said Barry. “Okay. Thanks.”

 

“Are you,” she started and stopped. “Are you sleeping with Snart, Barry?”

 

“No,” was Barry’s emphatic reply. “No… _NO_.”

 

He looked between Caitlin and Cisco. Neither looked convinced. Barry groaned and ran a hand over his face.

 

“I’m not,” he said again hoping that if he looked at them with a stern enough gaze while he said it that they’d believe him.

 

“Then what were you doing last night?” asked Cisco. “And why did you let him and Heat Wave go, for that matter?”

 

“I’m not sleeping with Len,” said Barry. “It’s… complicated. But I’m not… I haven’t… that’s not…” Barry trailed off and let out a frustrated sigh. “I gotta get to work.”

 

“Hold up,” said Cisco, eyes narrowed and mouth pulled down in a scowl. “When did Captain Cold become _Len_?”

 

Barry’s eyes widened in alarm.

 

“I… I don’t know,” he breathed.

 

 _Shit_ . Not only had Barry been losing sleep over him, but Leonard Snart had somehow become _Len_ in his own mind. When had _that_ happened? Barry glanced between Cisco and Caitlin as a sense of panic grew in his chest.

 

Cisco had a look on his face like Barry had just kicked his dog. Caitlin looked painfully sympathetic. Barry let out a pitchy, garbled sound of distress before turning and rushing out of there. He had to get to work, anyway.

 

\------------------

 

Barry didn’t hear from Len that day, or the day after that... or the day after that. In fact, it had been a week since the night Barry had showed up at Len’s house and he had not heard anything from him since. He wasn’t really sure why he expected to hear anything from him; it wasn’t like they really had much to do with each other beyond Barry showing up to thwart Len’s carefully planned heists.

 

Len was likely moved into his new house and back to his regular life by then. He was probably off holed up in some creepy, abandoned warehouse somewhere planning his next big heist. Technically, Barry _could_ call him since he still had his number from the prank calls and there was a chance he hadn’t changed it. Still, what would Barry even say?

 

He had already been surprisingly forward about his crush. He had been the one to approach Len in the car and then again at his own house. It had really only been after the fact that he had realized just how obvious he was being. Len hadn’t seemed interested in talking either time. He had been preoccupied the first time and attempting to stay distant the second. And really, they were probably both better off going back to being civil enemies.

 

Still, it was hard to take the hint and leave it be. Barry couldn’t get the image out of his mind of Len looking lost and small. Barry had known objectively that Len was attractive even before everything had weirdly shifted between them. He had already appreciated the handsomeness of his face and the cadence of his voice. And while he couldn’t help but reminisce over the shape of Len’s chest, the strength of his arms, and cut of his hips that had all been on display when he had answered the door in a towel, Barry mostly longed to see more of the person beneath the icy persona of Captain Cold. That glimpse of vulnerability was what kept Len on his mind.

 

There was good in Len, Barry had always believed that, but these new hints of depth to Leonard’s character had him wanting to see more. The puns and the terrible pranks, the flirtatious innuendo, they all showed a playful Leonard Snart. His willingness to walk alone into a dangerous situation with unknown variables to save his partner showed loyalty. And the obvious relief on his face once Mick was safe, showed he was someone who cared deeply. Barry wanted to know that someone.

 

It was frustrating that he probably wouldn’t see Len again for months and that it probably wouldn’t be outside of a Flash and Captain Cold standoff. It was _frustrating_ to feel so hung up on someone he actually didn’t really know and didn’t have opportunity to get to know. And it was _really frustrating_ that he couldn’t talk about it with anyone even though there were moments where his mess of feelings seemed like they were going to bubble over. Sure, things were mostly smoothed over between himself and Cisco, and also with Joe...mostly, but that didn’t mean he could openly discuss his frustrating crush. He doubted he would get much support from any of his friends considering _who_ he was crushing _on_. Plus, he’d rather not risk aggravating past arguments by bringing up Len.

 

Even though Barry was an adept moper, he didn’t actually have the time to spend pathetically pining for a sultry thief in a parka. There had been a series of crimes to investigate that had turned out to be a new metahuman criminal. So, between work and his _extracurricular activities_ with Team Flash, Barry was kept busy. Still, there were moments where he really wished he had never drunkenly rang Len’s doorbell that one night.

 

But there were also times where he found himself getting angry at Len for being a coward. He knew Len had felt something sparking there between them. It hadn’t all been one-sided; yet, Len refused to give him even a hint when he had asked for some clarity. And it was that returning frustration with Len that led Barry to react how he did when he spotted him at Jitters that afternoon.

 

Barry was at the till placing his coffee order, when he randomly noticed him out of the corner of his eye. There he was standing at the back of the long line that was nearly out the doors, looking like a posh menswear store mannequin.  It had been such a surprise to see him that Barry had stopped talking mid order.

 

“I’m sorry,” said the girl behind the till with a polite smile. “What was that?”

 

For a crazy second, Barry had thought Len was there looking for him. It was a thrilling second that filled his stomach with butterflies, but then he quickly realized Len wasn’t scanning the room as if looking for someone. He was simply standing in line like everyone else. Barry pouted. Where did Len even get off coming into _Barry’s_ turf looking like some GQ cover model?

 

“Sir?”

 

“Sorry,” said Barry with a little huff of embarrassed laughter after tearing his eyes away from Len. “Um, I’ll have a regular americano and…” he paused and a slow grin crossed his face as an idea struck him. “Uh... see that guy who just came in? The one wearing the trench coat in _80 degree weather_?”

 

The girl looked past him where he nodded with his chin and let out a little tinkling laugh when she spotted Len.

 

“He’s an old friend of mine,” explained Barry. “I’d like to order his coffee, too. _If_ that’s okay.”

 

“Sure,” said the girl with a shrug. “I don’t mind if you call him up here.”

 

“Haha, thanks,” said Barry, rubbing the back of his head.“But, no. I mean, I want to order his coffee… secretly.”

 

“Oh, okay,” she said with a devious smile. “Sure.”

 

“Thanks,” said Barry, grinning.  
  
He placed the order and went to the end of the counter to wait for his coffee to be ready. Once it was, he took it to a nearby table, trying to keep his back to Len and hoping he hadn’t been spotted, yet.

 

\------------

 

Leonard was honest enough with himself to admit his real purpose at Jitters wasn’t an afternoon coffee. No, his sudden caffeine craving was a direct result of having been near the coffee shop where he knew Barry took his breaks at the time of day when Barry usually took them.

 

Still, when he entered the coffee shop, he refused to look around like some lovelorn teenager hoping to catch a glimpse of his crush. He played it casual and waited in line. He’d order his coffee and if he happened to see Barry Allen while he was there, great. If Leonard was even more honest with himself, he’d admit that it would be even better if Barry noticed _him_ and approached. Of course, that was perhaps a bit _too honest_.

 

For a week, he had purposefully not engaged Barry in any way. He had wanted to put distance back where it had been quickly dwindling between them. It had been a solid plan, but one that was quickly falling apart.

 

Swift and without much effort, Barry had inserted himself into the forefront of Leonard’s mind. It was alarming to feel so hung up on the scarlet do-gooder. Even while drowning himself in the menial tasks of moving, his mind would turn back to that painfully earnest look on Barry’s face. Leonard had then worked on setting up a new heist, but couldn’t help letting thoughts of Barry and what he would think guide the decisions he made there.

 

The coffee shop was bustling with people which meant it would be easy to miss someone in the crowded room. Leonard continued to keep a bored look on his face and his eyes trained forward though his irritation was growing. All these people would obscure Barry’s view of him and this coffee run would be all for naught. Leonard had to consciously tamp down the urge to search the room for Barry’s familiar face.

 

Finally, the line had shifted and it was Leonard’s turn at the till.  
  
“Hello, I’d l--” he started, but the girl at the till interrupted with a mischievous smile.

 

“Your drink has already been ordered and paid for, Larold,” she said.

 

Leonard’s brow scrunched in confused surprise.

 

“Larold,” he repeated slowly under his breath, his tongue holding on to the strange mix of consonants.

 

“You can just go wait for it at the end of the counter,” she said politely but dismissively with a nod over her shoulder. Then she turned her attention to the person behind him.

 

With nothing else to do but obey, Leonard slowly walked down the line of the counter to the pick up area. He glanced at the row of tables to his right and nearly lost his stride when he discovered Barry watching him. Barry was seated at one of the nearby tables, smirking openly at him from over the lid of his to go cup. Leonard quickly looked away.

 

“One Iced Flash for Larold,” spoke the barista behind the counter before setting down a cup and whirling away to get started on another drink.

 

“Iced Flash,” murmured Leonard to himself, not able to keep the amused smile from his face. _Was that an innuendo? Barry Allen, you are just full of surprises_ , he thought to himself. He picked up the drink and retrieved a straw from the dispenser.

 

Leonard took his time taking the wrapper off the straw and pressing it into the lid. He wanted to go sit down across from Barry. He craved their easy banter and that quirky, private smile that sometimes appeared on Barry’s face when Leonard got just a little too flirtatious. He doubted Barry even knew he had that smile. Still, he actually did have places to be, plus his reasons for wanting distance between them still stood.

 

Drink in hand, Leonard walked toward Barry. Barry’s back was to him, but his posture was stiff and expectant like he was waiting for him. Did he hope Leonard would sit with him? Did he also crave his company? Leonard didn’t stop at Barry’s table, but he slowed his pace as he approached. He let his free hand trail lightly across Barry’s shoulders as he walked by.

  
“Thanks for the coffee,” he teased in a low voice as he passed.  
  
He could actually feel Barry shiver before he drew his hand away. Leonard grinned to himself and kept walking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ha ha.. more angst.
> 
> GOSH.
> 
> Listen, my wonderful beta is not a fan of angst... so, if you liked this chapter, pleaaaase thank her for wading through it MULTIPLE TIMES in order to help me get my ideas across in a more organised fashion. She has been working so hard on this fic and we are all so lucky for her.


	9. Had Me A Blast

Leonard walked into the living room of the safe house holding his laptop. 

 

“Another job already?” asked Mick from where he was laying on the couch.

 

“Were you hoping for a vacation?” asked Leonard as he set his laptop on the crate turned coffee table so Mick could see from his position.  Leonard tutted as Mick awkwardly pushed himself up into a sitting position, bandaged leg and ribs be damned.

 

“Naw,” grunted Mick. “I’m already bored.”

 

Leonard smirked.

 

“Wow, brother,” said Lisa as she sat down on the couch next to Mick. “How’d you find the time to plan our next job; haven’t you been busy?”

 

“This is an easy one,” said Leonard simply while keeping his eyes on the screen. She definitely didn’t need to know why he had scrambled to find something easy enough to pull off with only a couple days’ notice. He had needed a distraction from his inner turmoil over the  _ situation _ with Barry. 

 

Leonard opened a webpage on his laptop and turned it to show to Lisa and Mick.

 

“The Currie estate purchased this small sculpture at auction last week for seven million,” he said, showing them an article with a large photo of the small, disfigured sculpture at the top. “It arrived from Christie’s in New York last night.” 

 

“ _ Gregory Rupert Currie the second _ ,” huffed Mick with a derisive snort as he scanned over the article. “Hoity Toity.”

 

“I can’t believe someone paid  _ seven million _ dollars for  _ that _ ,” said Lisa shaking her head. “People have enough money to waste on ‘art’ that looks like something from a trash can and  _ we’re _ the criminals?”

 

“Mm,” hummed Mick in agreement.

 

“Indeed,” said Leonard before pressing going on. “They’ve had a brand new security system installed in their manor in anticipation of the piece; state of the art.”

 

Mick grinned and grabbed his gun from the back of the couch. Leonard frowned and shook his head.

 

“That won’t be necessary,” he said. “As I was saying; it’s state of the art... for a  _ private system _ . We’ve taken down much more complex setups. This will be simple.”

 

Mick huffed and set the gun back down. Leonard rolled his eyes at his sister as she patted Mick on the shoulder with pouted lips. She liked to baby him whenever she could and he always played right into it. It was unhealthy.

 

“According to the schematics I acquired, it’ll be a simple grab and dash; no harm, no foul,” explained Leonard, clicking over to a map of the manor’s interior on his laptop. “The Curries use a private security company. The silent alarm notifies their own security firm, completely bypassing the authorities until necessary. These affluent types like to keep their names out of the headlines; better for shareholders. Still, once they see  _ us _ on the footage, they’ll be calling the cops. I estimate we have eleven minutes after the silent alarm is triggered before badges show up.”

 

“A walk in the park,” grunted Mick.

 

“Sure,” said Lisa. “But what about the Flash?”

 

“Mm,” said Mick. “He gonna look the other way ‘cause you’re getting him off?”

 

“Crass,” snapped Leonard. “There is only a slight chance that Team Flash are keeping tabs on this security company’s system, but it is highly unlikely. They'll likely only hear about this alarm being tripped when the CCPD is contacted. In that case, we still have a six minute window before the Flash shows up. By then we’ll be long gone.”

 

“Seems easy enough,” said Mick. “When do I get to do my thing?”

 

“I told you,” said Leonard with a sigh. “We won’t be needing the guns.”

 

“What?” growled Mick, eyes widening in horror.

 

“It’s a private residence,” said Leonard. “They don’t even have guards; just a few cameras, a wrought iron gate, three guard dogs, and the silent alarm. We can do this in our sleep.”

 

“I hate dogs,” grumbled Mick. “I’m more of a cat person,” he offered when Lisa gave him a questioning look.

 

“It’s nothing we haven’t handled before,” said Leonard.

 

“Why the throwback, Lenny?” asked Lisa. “Are you hurting for some funds with that  _ big _ purchase of yours?”

 

Leonard snapped the laptop shut.

 

“I don’t know what you mean.”

 

“This just seems too easy,” said Lisa with a shrug. “I’m not complaining, but this kind of job seems below you. Maybe a couple years ago, but it’s not something that would interest you now. You don’t care about an easy pay-out. You’re about the fun of the game, not the spoils.”

 

“Yeah,” said Mick, looking grouchy. “And this doesn’t sound that fun.”

 

“You’re still injured,” pointed out Leonard. 

 

Mick didn’t look bothered. Leonard ground his teeth.

 

“A cool seven mill for an evening’s work doesn’t sound fun to you?” he asked, narrowing his eyes at the two in irritation. “I have a job, a buyer, and a plan, all you have to do is show up and you’ll get a cut of 2 million each... and you’re complaining that it’s too easy?”

 

“It’s no fun if I don’t get to use my gun,” grumbled Mick. “When are we doing this?”

 

“Tomorrow night.”

 

“Mm,” was all Mick said, pushing up from the couch and gingerly trudging into the kitchen.

 

Leonard and Lisa sat in silence as Mick slowly left the room. Only once Leonard heard the refrigerator door open in the kitchen, did he glance over at Lisa. She was eyeing him thoughtfully. He knew she had more to say about the plan.

 

“You chose this  _ because _ it was quick and easy,” she said. 

 

“Something to do between jobs,” said Leonard with a shrug. “Don’t want to get bored.”

 

Lisa didn’t look satisfied with his response. She pursed her lips. Leonard held his breath, he didn’t like that look on her face.

 

“The Flash probably doesn’t care so much if some filthy-rich jerk loses his new toy,” said Lisa slowly. “Especially if no one gets hurt in the process.”

 

Leonard swallowed nervously and picked up his laptop to put away, but it was really just for something to do. He could feel Lisa’s critical eyes on him. He wondered when she had gotten so adept at reading him.

 

“You’re not scared of him,” she continued. Leonard huffed at the concept. He’d never been afraid of the Flash, even before he knew his identity. “So, this isn’t you trying to avoid his involvement by following the agreement. And yes, I know about your stupid agreement. Cisco let it slip last time. So why are you--  _ Oh _ .”

 

Leonard looked up when Lisa stopped. She had a surprised look on her face that slowly morphed into a knowing grin. 

 

“You  _ like  _ him,” she said. “Hell, maybe you  _ love  _ him.”

 

“Lisa,” growled Leonard in warning.

 

“And you want to prove that you can play by his rules so that he’ll love you  _ back _ ,” she said laughing. 

 

Leonard wasn’t sure what his face was doing, but Lisa took one look at him and her laugh went an entire octave higher.

 

“Oh, this is going to be  _ fun _ ,” she said between giggles.

 

“Fun?” called Mick from the kitchen. “He gonna let us use our guns?” 

 

Leonard closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

 

\----------------

 

It was late and Barry was just going to bed when Cisco called him from STAR Labs. 

 

“CCTS just alerted the police of a break in at one of their fancy schmancy clients’ homes,” said Cisco. “Sounds like they’ll need back-up.”

 

“I’m on my way,” said Barry.

 

In seconds, Barry was in his suit and racing to the scene with Cisco in his ear giving him the address. He sped across town and found the manor just on the outskirts. The property was surrounded by a tall brick fence blocking the view of the estate from the road. Large, mature trees line the fence. A tall, ornate wrought iron gate stood blocking the driveway. It was passcode protected and two security cameras were trained on it from the brick fence. 

 

The gate, however, had a large hole scorched right through it. The ends of what was left of the the metal were still glowing hot and red in the dark. 

 

“I think Heat Wave’s here,” muttered Barry to himself. He placed a finger to the bolt at his ear and reported to Cisco. “The gate has a car-sized hole burned right through it. It’s gotta be the work of Mick Rory’s heat gun.”

 

“ _ Great _ ,” was Cisco’s reply.

 

Barry stepped through the large hole and jogged up the drive on high alert. The landscaping on both sides of the drive was untouched; everything seemed intact. When Barry got to the large, stone manor, he raced around it in a blur scanning for clues. The patio doors leading to the garden at the back were wide open. They might not have been the point of entry, but the Rogues had definitely left through them. Barry slowed down and crept inside.

 

He stepped in to find himself in a large sitting room. He glanced around, but nothing seemed disturbed. 

 

“What did the police say was taken?” asked Barry.

 

“A sculpture of some sort, I think,” responded Cisco.

 

Barry hummed and gave the room another quick once over before going further into the house. The sitting room opened onto another fancy room, this one with a piano. It also appeared untouched. Barry turned to go through the door and that was when there was a shout and he was nearly hit from behind. Using his superspeed, Barry leapt back and whirled around.

 

A man in fancy pajamas and plush robe was running at him with a poker from the fireplace and a ton of panicked bravado. He stopped when he caught sight of Barry.

 

“The Flash?” he questioned, panting.

 

Barry raised his hands defensively. The man lowered the poker, fight leaving him.

 

“The police are on the way,” said Barry, vibrating his voice box. “Is everyone okay?”

 

“It’s just me and I’m fine,” said the man.

 

“Do you know if the thieves are still here?”

 

“I didn’t see anyone,” said the man. “I woke when my dogs came running into my room whining. The useless guard dogs are still hiding under my bed. So I came downstairs to check on things and I found  _ you _ .”

 

“I’ll have a look around,” said Barry. “Sit tight, the police will be here real soon.”

 

The man nodded and Barry sped from the room. He sped through a lobby and into a grandiose hallway that led into the main reception hall near the front of the house. He paused when he saw the large pedestals around the outskirts of the circular room. Each had a small sculpture on it. In the centre was another column-shaped pedestal with a ceiling pot light trained on it.

 

On that pedestal wasn’t a sculpture, but a block of ice. 

 

“Strange,” he muttered.

 

“What?” asked Cisco in his ear.

 

Barry frowned curiously at the block of ice. 

 

“It definitely looks like it was the Rogues and they’ve already gone,” he said to Cisco. “Strange that they’d steal from a private residence, not a bank or something big.”

 

“You’re right, the sculpture is worth a lot, but it definitely isn’t Snart’s usual MO. I’m looking into getting the security footage right now, maybe it’ll have some answers,” offered Cisco.

 

Barry eyed the block of ice, moving warily closer for a better look.

 

“There’s a block of ice about the size of a small melon left behind. I think it has something in it.”

 

“Careful, Barry,” warned Cisco.

 

Barry disregarded the worry in Cisco’s voice. Len wouldn’t leave a trap for him, not with how everything that had been going on between them --at least he hoped not. Heart pounding at the possibilities of what would have been left behind for him to find, Barry took another step closer. There was no cliche, blinking red light as if it were some sort of bomb counting down to explode.

 

“It’s…” Barry leaned closer, tilting his head as he tried to peer through the thick ice.

 

“What? What is it?” breathed Cisco over their connection.

 

“...a Jitters gift card??” 

 

“What?”

 

Police sirens were wailing in the distance. Barry looked around the room one last time before turning back to the ice. He frowned at it consideringly. Finally, he shrugged and grabbed it before running back to STAR Labs. He set it on a table in the lab when he arrived. 

 

Cisco appeared at his side and leaned forward to peer at it suspiciously. 

 

“What is it?” asked Caitlin coming into the room.

 

“I think it’s a gift card,” said Barry with an incredulous laugh.

 

“It could be a trap,” said Cisco eyeing it suspiciously.

 

“It’s already melting from the trip here, why don’t I just…” Barry grabbed the block and vibrated his hands until it melted completely and was left with a gift card in his hand. Cisco ducked like he thought it really was a bomb that would go off the moment it thawed.

 

Barry ignored him. He turned the card over in his hand quizzically. On the back, written in black sharpie in familiar sharp, neat printing were the words ‘ _ this one’s on me _ ’. Barry’s stomach swooped when he recognized the printing from the card that had come with his flowers. It had really been Len’s writing.

 

Cisco took the card from Barry’s hand and looked it over.

 

“‘This one’s on me’,” he read. “Hah, I get it, because it’s his fault that he stole the sculpture; ‘it’s on me’. Haha, boo... puns.”

 

Barry bit back a smile and shook his head.

 

“Have you been in contact with Snart lately, Barry?” asked Caitlin curiously.

 

“No, well, except that I saw him… at Jitters a couple days ago,” replied Barry having to fight  _ another _ smile as he remembered Len’s face when he was given the Iced Flash and called ‘Larold’. But his face heated at the additional memory of Len’s fingertips dragging lightly over his shoulders as he walked by. The cadence of Len’s voice in that lower register as he murmured ‘thank you’ had haunted Barry each night since. 

 

“But.. uh… w-we didn’t talk,” finished Barry lamely.

 

Cisco was looking at him with narrowed eyes. 

 

“Right,” muttered Cisco. “So, what do we want to do about the stolen sculpture?”

 

“I don’t know,” said Barry, plucking the gift card from Cisco’s hand. “It’s just some rich guy’s sculpture, right? I’m sure the police can handle it. Plus, the thing’s probably insured,” said Barry with a shrug. He was looking down at the gift card and didn’t notice Cisco and Caitlin exchanging looks. 

 

“Yeah, probably,” agreed Cisco slowly.

 

“What?” asked Barry, looking up when he heard Cisco’s tone. 

 

“Nothing,” said Cisco raising his hands, but he had a look on his face that said otherwise. 

 

Barry frowned at him suddenly feeling defensive. He glanced over at Caitlin who shrugged in response. They both looked way too judgy. Barry kept his gaze trained on her, knowing she’d be the first to break.

 

“You just don’t seem too bothered that Snart got away with the sculpture,” offered Caitlin a little meekly.

 

“Well, the main thing is that no one was hurt, right?”    
  
“Well, yes,” agreed Caitlin looking like she had more to say.

 

“Okay, well, I’m gonna head home,” said Barry still clutching the gift card. “Goodnight, guys.”

  
  


\-----

 

The next day, when Barry showed up back at STAR labs, Cisco was excitedly waiting for him.

 

“Barry,” he called eagerly as Barry walked in. “You  _ have  _ to see this.”

 

“Okay,” laughed Barry. “What’s up?”

 

Cisco clicked on his computer and pulled up a news article and put it on the large monitor. Caitlin popped into the room and stepped up to stand beside Barry.

 

“National Family Builders, a Non-Profit Organization for Foster Children received an unexpected  _ 2 million dollar _ donation this morning by a Mr. ...L-larold Snark,” read Barry outloud. He choked when he got to the name.

 

Cisco snorted a laugh, covering his mouth and forcing himself to be serious. He probably didn’t like the idea of laughing because of Len’s sense of humour twice in a 24 hour period. 

 

“That’s Leonard Snart, right?” asked Cisco.

 

“That’s him,” agreed Barry hoarsely, staring at the article as an bubbly feeling that he couldn’t place filled his chest. 

 

“ _ Damn _ , Barry,” said Cisco.

Barry jerked his head up to look at Cisco, belatedly wondering what he would think. He’d been to busy reeling. Surprisingly, Cisco was grinning.

 

“Who’d have thought that all it’d take for him to go straight was some _ summer loving _ ?” said Cisco, singing the last words.

 

“Grease? Really?,” sighed Barry, crossing his arms and looking up at the ceiling. “Why are you like this?” 

 

“That’s not  _ really _ straight, though is it?” asked Caitlin. “He still  _ stole _ .”

 

“Yeah, but he stole from some rich jerk and used the money to help foster kids…  _ foster kids…  _ y’know, like  _ Barry _ ,” an Cisco before turning back to Barry. “He went  _ Robin Hood _ for you. That’s some serious romantic gesture.”

 

“You think?” asked Barry, turning to Caitlin for confirmation because Cisco had already proven himself ridiculous with his recent quips at Barry’s expense.

 

“ _ Very _ romantic,” said Caitlin, nodding, but she didn’t look happy to admit it.

 

“Call him,” demanded Cisco, pulling up Len’s number on the computer from when they had prank called him.

 

Nervous butterflies filled Barry’s stomach. He could feel his face heating. 

 

“You’ve changed your tune pretty quickly,” he quipped, trying to ignore his nerves.

 

“What can I say,” said Cisco. “I’m a sucker for love.”

 

Barry quickly grabbed his phone when he saw Cisco moving his cursor over the call button on the computer monitor.

 

“How about I text him, instead,” Barry exclaimed, strained voice coming out louder in his sudden panic than he had meant.

 

“Aww, boring,” whined Cisco.

 

Barry laughed nervously and copied the number from the screen to his phone. Caitlin and Cisco were both watching him expectantly.

 

“Meet me at Jitters tomorrow morning at 10,” he said out loud for their benefits as he typed the message on the his phone. He hit send and held the phone out so they could see the screen. “Sent. Happy now?”

 

Cisco was grinning and nodding. Caitlin’s lips were pursed. Barry lowered the phone and looked down at it again. It suddenly dawned on him what he had just done. He’d just invited Len to coffee --well, more like demanded it. Barry felt dizzy with the sudden mixture of excitement and dread that washed over him. 

 

“Barry’s got a date with Captain Cold,” singsonged Cisco.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've added my amazing beta, BrodeurBunny, as a co-author because HONESTLY she has put SO much time into this fic and, while I may have 'birthed it', she is definitely the co-parent and birth coach here. GOSH, I hope you guys like this chapter, it was so fun to write after the angst of chapter eight.


	10. Surprised Pikachu Face

 

Leonard spotted Barry already standing in line when he walked into Jitters. A flutter of anticipation squirmed in his stomach at the sight of him. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt like this about someone. The feeling was not unlike the nearly obsessive interest he first had in the Flash; the need to know who he was and what he could do, that exhilaration when he had his attention. It was fitting that it would be the person behind the mask who would end up giving him his first crush since childhood. 

 

Leonard took a routine sweep of the room before letting his eyes be drawn back to Barry. He moved past the other people in line to stand next to him. Barry’s face lit with a small smile when Leonard reached his side, which was a new development, one that had Leonard’s heart speeding up. 

 

“Barry,” greeted Leonard, not missing the quick appreciative once over Barry gave him.

 

“Larold,” replied Barry with a mockingly low voice and a cheeky grin. He was bouncing on the balls of his feet like he was filled with nervous energy.

 

Leonard didn't hide his amused smile.

 

“Cute.”

 

“ _ Yes, you are _ ,” breathed Barry to himself. He probably hadn’t even meant to say it out loud, but Leonard heard him.

 

“That why you asked me to coffee Barry?” he asked, tilting his head and smiling over-sweet. “Because you think I'm  _ cute _ .”

 

Barry blushed red and gave him another quick look up and down seemingly without meaning to. 

 

“Something like that,” he said cheekily, surprising Leonard. He pulled a gift card from his pocket and gave it a little wave as they moved forward in the line. “Coffee's on me... well, you,” he said with a little laugh and rubbed at the back of his head with his free hand. “So, what do you want?” 

 

“Cold brew, one pump of sugar,” answered Leonard. “While I enjoyed the Iced Flash last time, it had maybe a touch too much caffeine. I prefer my heartrate to be invigorated smoothly over the course of an entire evening.” 

 

Barry’s mouth fell open.

 

“I'll go save us a table,” he said, smiling at Barry’s surprised face. He sauntered away as the girl at the till turned her attention on Barry. He could hear Barry stuttering to order behind him and his smirk grew.

 

As Leonard went to find a table, he noticed Cisco and Dr. Snow sitting in the far corner doing a terrible job of staying hidden. They were both sitting on the same side of the small circle table staring openly at him. They both quickly raised open books to their faces when they saw him look their way. Dr. Snow’s was upside down and she had to quickly flip it around. Amused, Leonard chose a table that would keep Barry’s back to them. No need to ruin their coffee date by having Barry discover his friends being nosy. 

 

... _ Date _ . 

 

Leonard had wondered what Barry intended when he’d told Leonard to meet him at Jitters by text the day before. No matter the reasons behind Barry wanting to meet him, he wouldn’t turn down another chance to see him. Naively, he had hoped it would be a date and had made sure to dress up --but not so much that it would give away his intentions should they not line up with Barry’s. However, Barry’s blush in the line had been a tick in the correct box. Cisco and Dr. Snow spying on them was another. Perhaps Leonard would get his wish.

 

Leonard pulled out his phone while he waited for Barry, it had been vibrating in his pocket off and on for the past twenty minutes. Lisa had given him a hard time that morning when he said he had somewhere to be. She had joked that he was meeting with the Flash for another romp in the sheets. If Barry really meant for this to be a  _ date _ , then Lisa wasn’t too far off in her ribbing. 

 

Leonard wrinkled his nose at the bombardment of texts from her on his screen. 

 

“Here you go,” said Barry, placing Leonard’s drink down on the table with a flourish before sitting down across from him. Leonard quirked a smile and locked his phone before pushing it to the side. 

 

“So, to what do I owe the honour of a  _ coffee date _ with Central City’s favourite speedster? Here to scold me for stealing?”

 

“No,” said Barry, playing with his coffee cup and smiling down at the table. “I… uh… heh,” Barry looked up at him and his face turned a touch serious. “Honestly,” he said.  “I don’t know what I’m doing. I just... wanted to see you.”

 

There it was again, that sweet, earnest face. Leonard wrinkled his brow, unsure how to respond. Barry was searching his face and he wasn’t sure what he would find there. Finally, he swallowed down some unnamed emotion that had been building at the back of his throat and smiled.

 

“Well, lucky me,” he said. It came out more genuine than he had meant and he could tell Barry was momentarily stunned. But Leonard couldn’t regret being overly transparent when Barry’s face broke out in another bashful smile.

 

“So, I’ve been told in the past not to ‘ _ talk shop’ _ during a date, but I have to ask,” said Barry. Leonard’s stomach did that weird flip again at the confirmation of it being a date. Damn, but he’d really gone full high school crush. “Is this new ‘Prince of Thieves’ version of Captain Cold planning on sticking around?”

 

“Ah,” said Leonard, both embarrassed and pleased. “So you saw the donation.”

 

“Yeah,” said Barry. “Well done, Mr.  _ Snark _ .”

 

Leonard smirked at that, but he didn’t know how to answer Barry’s question. It was a loaded question, one that Barry would need an answer for. It pressed at the main issue Leonard foresaw coming between them. What would he have to do or give up in order to have Barry? 

 

He knew he wouldn’t stop stealing, not even for Barry, but the ‘Robin Hood act’ (as Barry obviously thought of it), might be something he could maintain. Still, he wasn’t sure how long he could keep it from the Rogues and he didn’t know what they’d think of him… ’ _ stealing from the rich to give to the poor _ ’. He couldn’t have them thinking he was going soft. 

 

“Oh no,” groaned Barry pulling Leonard from his thoughts.

 

Barry must have seen something from the corner of his eye that he didn’t like. He was looking over his shoulder now and-- oh, right, Cisco and Dr. Snow.

 

“What is it?” asked Leonard, though he already knew.

 

Barry groaned and leaned his face in his hands in defeat. 

 

“I’m sorry, Len,” he said looking up. Damn, but Leonard loved hearing Barry call him that. “My  _ friends  _ are here spying.”

 

Barry moved to stand and Leonard quickly reached out to grab his wrist. 

 

“Cisco and Dr. Snow?” he asked. Barry gave him a surprised look. Leonard shrugged. “I noticed them earlier.”

 

Barry sat back down and Leonard released his wrist, feeling a little off-centre for having grabbed it in the first place. He didn’t care if Barry’s friends were spying, he just didn’t want to lose the ease with which Barry and he had been interacting.

 

“I’m sorry they’re spying,” said Barry. Leonard watched as he nervously swirled his coffee in his cup and then took a drink. “It was my fault for letting them know what I was doing.”

 

“They worried I’m planning to kidnap and have my way with you?” asked Leonard, lifting an eyebrow.

 

Barry spat out his drink, eyes wide. He coughed as he quickly grabbed a napkin to wipe the table. His face was beet red. Leonard felt smug.

 

“No, uh…” Barry paused to let out an awkward laugh. “They think we’re… together.”

 

“Together?” asked Leonard. “You  _ did  _ call this a date.”

 

“Well, yes,” said Barry,  “But they seem to think we’ve been…  _ having sex _ … for a while now.”

 

Leonard chuckled at the way Barry paused before nearly whispering ‘having sex’. So, Barry’s friends had the same impression that Lisa and Mick did. The sexual tension between Barry and himself must have been a lot more obvious than he’d thought. 

 

_ “ _ Oh, Barry,” he teased. “Enemies with benefits? I didn’t think that was  _ your _ M-O.”

 

Barry really didn’t seem the type to get in bed with the enemy, but perhaps Leonard was mistaken on the stringency of Barry’s moral compass. If Barry’s closest friends had honestly thought he had been having sex with  _ Captain Cold _ the whole time, perhaps Leonard needed to reevaluate. Perhaps it wouldn’t be such a leap for Barry to accept Leonard, thefts and all. 

 

“Augh,” groaned Barry still looking embarrassed. “I’m really sorry about them.” 

 

“Lisa and Mick are under the same impression,” offered Leonard.

 

“What, really?”

  
  
Leonard reached for his phone and unlocked the screen. He turned it Barry so he could see the bombardment of texts from Lisa. 

 

“She thinks we are right now, actually,” said Leonard, unable to resist punctuating it with a wink.

 

Barry’s face went red,  _ again _ . It was almost too easy. Leonard would now have a whole new reason to call him ‘Scarlet’.

 

“Haha, wow. That... wow,” said Barry after scanning over the texts on Leonard’s phone. “So everyone we know thinks that this whole time we’ve been…”

  
  
“Having ‘ _sexy_ _rendezvous_ ’?” offered Leonard, quoting one of Lisa’s texts. 

 

Barry nodded before leaning his chin on the palm of his hand.

 

“I guess the joke’s on us,” quipped Leonard.

 

Barry bit his nails, giving Leonard a contemplative look. 

  
  


“Yes, but... it doesn’t have to be,” he said, carefully.

 

Leonard swore his heart stopped in his chest for a full five seconds. He cleared his throat and leaned forward over the table on his elbows.

 

“What did you have in mind?” he asked, his voice pitching low of its own accord.

  
  
Barry looked nervous but something else, too. 

 

“We’re not  _ really  _ enemies, are we?” Barry asked.

 

Leonard knew his answer was no; he didn’t see Barry as an enemy anymore --probably hadn’t for a long time. Sure, they weren’t on the same side, but they weren’t enemies. He liked Barry. He  _ trusted _ Barry. Still, he stared at him silently for a few moments, enjoying how Barry tried not to squirm. He took a drink of his cold brew.

 

Finally, he tilted his head to the side and said “No, I don’t think we are.”

 

Though Barry didn’t look the least bit surprised with Leonard’s answer, he did look a touch relieved. 

 

“So, I guess that means ‘ _ enemies _ with benefits’ isn’t on the table,” said Leonard.   
  
Barry smiled and looked down bashfully. He was adorable.

 

“What about boyfriends?” he asked, looking back up from beneath his eyelashes.

 

_ That _ caught Leonard off guard.

 

\---------------

 

Barry internally berated himself. The moment the question had left his lips, he knew he sounded like a complete idiot. He wanted Len. He had finally let himself think about it over the past week and he had come to terms with the fact that he wanted him…  _ so bad _ .  

 

Still, he needed to remember who Len was. Leonard Snart was someone harder, older, and colder than him. Barry always got a thrill from their back and forth banter and it was easy to lose track of severity of situations they were in because of it. Whenever Leonard smirked at him with narrowed eyes, Barry wanted to press into his space. But when Leonard showed even an ounce of authenticity, Barry was filled with this urge to completely surrender to him. Perhaps his friends and Joe were right to worry, Len had quickly become his weakness. 

 

He definitely wanted Len in more ways than just as a ‘ _ hook-up _ ’, like Lisa had described in her increasingly inappropriate texts to Len. But, Barry knew he had to come at this with no expectations. Their situation was unique and complicated, just like the man who was sitting in front of him --the man who had looked genuinely shocked at Barry’s  _ idiotic question _ and whom still hadn’t answered. Barry wished the floor would swallow him.

 

“I’m sorry,” broke Barry. “That wa--”

 

“ _ What would that entail _ ?” asked Len, the beginnings of a smirk returning to his face.

 

Relieved, Barry dropped his head and laughed. He remembered those exact words from the prank phone call well. Len’s teasingly provocative lines during that conversation had haunted many an alone time since. 

 

“Well,” said Barry, feeling daring. “I’d be available for home visits should you ever need a duct cleaning.”

 

Len threw his head back and laughed. Butterflies released in a fluttering swarm through Barry’s belly. He grinned proudly at having made Len actually laugh.

 

“I’m available right now if you have an opening,” said Len. 

 

Barry’s heart suddenly threatened to beat its way out of his chest. He swallowed heavily and made to stand.

 

“I, yes, let’s… do that,” he stuttered out before frowning at himself for being too eager. 

 

Len didn’t seem to mind. He had a small, private smile on his face as he stood and pocketed his phone. Barry picked up his coffee cup which was mostly still full, and turned to leave as Len motioned for him to go ahead. He couldn’t  _ (and wouldn’t) _ help the goofy smile he could feel stretching his face when Len put a hand low on his back as they walked to the door. 

 

He glanced sideways to see Len throw a wink to Cisco and Caitlin. Barry snickered when he looked past Len to see his friends both staring unashamedly. He gave them a little wave and laughed when Cisco’s mouth dropped open.

 

“I thought you didn’t want me knowing where you live,” asked Barry as he and Len stepped out onto the sidewalk.

 

“Yes, well, that was  _ before _ you offered to clean my ducts,” quipped Len, raising his eyebrows meaningfully.

 

“ _ Technically _ ,” argued Barry with a chuckle. “I offered that before you had even moved.”

 

Len snorted. 

 

“The nature of the offer changed,” he said soberly. Barry glanced sideways at him in time to see Len purse his lips like he was stopping himself from smiling. 

 

“Plus,” continued Len, words suddenly coming out slow and careful,  “I think where I live would be necessary information for my  _ boyfriend _ to have.”

 

Barry stopped and turned to grin brightly at Len. There was a sparkle in Len’s blue eyes that made Barry’s heart swell. He leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to Len’s cheek before linking their arms.

 

“Yeah, I think you’re right,” he said.

 

He smiled to himself when Len leaned into his side. As they continued walking, Barry grinned up at the blue sky and wondered to himself at the insanity that led him to such a perfect moment. He was happy to take Joe’s advice and slow down to enjoy it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY FRIENDS!
> 
> Thank you for reading. This fic started out with the idea of Len and Barry playing pranks on each other and then realizing their pranks were more flirty courting shenanigans and getting together... and I mean, I guess that's still what it is... but it definitely fleshed out into a larger fic than I was expecting it to be. 
> 
> It was SO fun to be able to work collaboratively with my good friend BrodeurBunny who was THE MOST dedicated Beta ever! She was really great with challenging my ideas and pushing me to switch things up. A lot of the scenes in this fic are well outside of my comfort zone and were probably things I wouldn't have even considered trying had BrodeurBunny not been in my corner. I still can't believe we managed to write this fic in less than twenty days... especially given my terrible terrible habit of leaving fics as WIPs. 
> 
> I'm really proud of us for actually getting this one done. That was all because of the tireless hours of both hand-holding and acting as drill sergeant that BrodeurBunny put in. I hope you all enjoyed the fic. The last chapter is always the one to give me the most performance anxiety, but my hope is that you are satisfied with the ending.
> 
> I AM planning a short, after-the-credits style bonus scene... so you still have that coming at you.


	11. EPILOGUE

Barry arrived to work the next day with a pep in his step and his head in the clouds. He whistled happily to himself as he bounced up the front steps of the CCPD... and nearly ran right into two different people as he walked into the building.

 

“Oops, sorry,” he said, laughing as he quickly reached out to right the one woman’s stack of paperwork and coffee cup before she dropped it while the other person he bumped hurried on their way. “So, sorry!”

 

“It’s fine,” she said while giving him a glare that didn’t match her words. Barry smiled apologetically at her.

 

His mind was still set firmly on the day before.  He had gone home with Len from their coffee date and ended up spending the majority of the day at his new place.  They had done a lot of talking and a lot more _decidedly not_ talking. Barry had taken his time discovering all the different ways his hands fit against Len's lean but muscular body. Len had shown him other ways in which his mouth could be smart.

 

They had ordered in a late lunch when Barry couldn’t ignore his hunger any longer. While they ate, they had talked about how their relationship status would affect the interactions of Captain Cold and the Flash. Then Len had said something ridiculous and Barry had grinned and walked him back to his bedroom where he could make up for it. It had been late in the afternoon when Barry had finally gone home. His phone had been filled with text after text from Cisco as well as a couple of missed calls when he had finally checked it.

 

“Barry!” called Joe pulling Barry from his thoughts.

 

“Hey, Joe,” said Barry, sending him an easy smile. “How’re you?”

 

“Good,” said Joe as he reached his side and walked with him. “I didn’t hear from you all yesterday. How was your day off?”

 

“It was really great,” said Barry unable to keep the dreamy smile off his face

 

Joe cocked an eyebrow at him.

 

“It _must_ have been,” he said with a small shake of his head. “So, do you have the results back on the tests you ran on those new metahumans the other day? We found another crime scene yesterday that resembles the one before.”

 

“And you didn’t call me?” exclaimed Barry.

 

“I did,” said Joe, “but you didn’t answer. I called in Cisco to consult, instead. He said you were busy doing _undercover_ work?”

 

Barry snorted. _Undercover_ ; he’d have to tell Len that one.

 

“Yeah, that’s the same face he made when he said it,” said Joe, turning to point a finger at Barry. “Is this something I should know about? ...Wait, is it something I _want_ to know about?”

 

“Probably not,” said Barry with a pitchy laugh. He reached his hand back to rub nervously at the back of his neck, but quickly dropped it when he remembered Len pointing it out as being his tell. “You’ll have to know eventually, but I think you’ll be happier to stay in the dark for a while.”

 

“Hmm.”

 

Joe gave Barry a suspicious look before shrugging to himself. Barry bit his lips together in guilty amusement. Poor Joe was going to be at such a loss when Barry finally did tell him he was dating notorious criminal, Leonard Snart. He winced knowing just how angry and worried Joe would be. Hopefully Joe would get over it --he’d have to because Barry wasn’t going to let Len go any time soon. Barry chewed his bottom lip. Family dinners were going to be drastically changed once he started bringing Len with him.  

 

“By the way,” said Joe as they neared the lab. “You really need to start showing up to work _on time._ It would spare me from having to sign for all these deliveries for you.”

 

“Deliveries?” asked Barry tilting his head in curiousity.

 

Joe just gave him a longsuffering smile that really looked more like a frown despite the upturned corners of his mouth. They walked down the hall to his lab.

 

When they reached the open doorway, Barry stopped dead in his tracks. Sitting on his desk was a _giant_ , white teddy bear wearing a winter coat and scarf with a big red heart on its lap. His heart felt like it skipped a beat in his chest at the sight of it.

 

“Oh my _gosh_ ,” he breathed.  
  
Barry strode across the room and dropped his bag at the side of his desk. The red heart was a box of chocolates leaned up against the huge, plush polar bear. It had a small card on it that Barry was quick to pluck and read. He was expecting it to say something like ‘thanks for yesterday’ in a silly parody of the last time Len sent him a gift at work.

 

 

He was surprised then, that it actually said;

_Sweets for my Sweetie._

_\--L_

 

 

Barry’s cheeks ached from how hard he smiled at the sentiment. He _loved_ how unapologetically ridiculous Len could be.

 

Joe cleared his throat and Barry quickly put the card in his pocket while trying to force his expression into something more neutral. But he could feel that his face had grown warm with a blush.

 

“Another prank from a wealthy asshole?” asked Joe with a raised eyebrow.

 

Barry petted a hand over the soft fur of the plush polar bear and smiled to himself. Might as well go for broke.

  
“No,” he said with a shake of his head and a little chuckle. “A _gift_ from _my_ wealthy asshole.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you sooo much for reading :D
> 
>  
> 
> P.S. If any of you are writing fic with Leonard Snart and are able to use "Leonard Snart is Big Dick Energy" as a tag for your fics... it is my goooaal to get that tag more prevalent. Just ssaaaaaying.


End file.
